gosh.
i am a wonderful mediator!
trning was quite okay.
but was rather pissed when i dint get to do the boasts thingy for some reason.
mr li was like 4 of you come.
then what about meeee!!!!!!
shsdncuscbicbe
shoosh
nvm.
but now im happy.
cos im a mediator.
i look forward to milo all stars.
and i love macs!
and im a trend setter.
CAT uses shoosh too.
its non-vulgar and relives anger!
and the blogger thingy turned blue again!
and gvnuevnguewbvbw
i dont understand why some ppl are so irresponsible and rude and tactless.
maybe i am too but....im not as bad
oh well.
OH.
the " shi4 wang3 mo2 xiao4 li4" thingy
its super logical and cool.
its like...
if u have a special trait or some thing,
u will notice more of it....
EG. u buy a toy car, u think its unique,then u realise ten other ppl on the streets have it.
COS u pay more attention to look out for it.
EG 2. if u are irresponsible, u will think alot of ppl are too.cos u will notice the trait u have,and see if others have it to.
its a natural reaction!
and tmr going out with simin!
next friday is team dinner
and monday go prize presentation and Spot Check.
shhooosh
yay im gonna watch da chang jin now!
Saturday, May 13, 2006
Friday, May 12, 2006
i just realised
theres so many people to help.
so many people out there...
some right before me.
and now that i know the truth or maybe what appears to be the truth,
i guess i just have to help you.
but its not that simple.
and maybe what u need isnt me.
and maybe im just acting saintly and dont really mean to help you.
nope.
i want to help if i can.
but im sure my helpfulness will just be deemed by you as fakeness.
and perhaps it will just do more harm than good.
it will probably be super short term which is precisely what you moan of.
but face it.
reality is that nothing is permanent.
HAH.
you will never ever read this.
cos u dont know that i found out the truth about you.
and besides.
we are 90% strangers so this post doesnt really matter.
im just sharing my views with myself.
yes.
and i just want to let you know that...
nothing.
besides,you'll never read this.
strangers can be more than strange.
i dint know others felt as deprived as i did
so many people out there...
some right before me.
and now that i know the truth or maybe what appears to be the truth,
i guess i just have to help you.
but its not that simple.
and maybe what u need isnt me.
and maybe im just acting saintly and dont really mean to help you.
nope.
i want to help if i can.
but im sure my helpfulness will just be deemed by you as fakeness.
and perhaps it will just do more harm than good.
it will probably be super short term which is precisely what you moan of.
but face it.
reality is that nothing is permanent.
HAH.
you will never ever read this.
cos u dont know that i found out the truth about you.
and besides.
we are 90% strangers so this post doesnt really matter.
im just sharing my views with myself.
yes.
and i just want to let you know that...
nothing.
besides,you'll never read this.
strangers can be more than strange.
i dint know others felt as deprived as i did
cjhgiurnvuencvheni
goodness gracious me.
psmcnhvhvonckehoiu
idjxiebcuebxueubu4ciu34bfiubiuxbiu4hxiu4hx
ok.
i feel better spewing nonsense.
gosh.
but im still highly irritable.
and i honestly wished some ppl would leave me alone to rot and stop making things difficult for me.
its like...
OBVIOUSLY a trap for me to fall in.
and if i dont fall into that trap, i will just fall ino another.
either way u will just rip my life away.
AND THUS, i have decided to feign ignorance.
hah.
so now u will just think i fell into your trap or im ignorant.
well.
the uncertainty is enough.
but dont be sad if u think i fell into your trap :)
i bet u dont know what im talking about.
i must learn to make things more unidentifiable.
i love philosphy!
guess what
i borrowed a book on capital punishment though philo is over.
but its so cheem i read one page gave up.
i shall borrow another one onterrorism and racism!
"capital punishment means :anyone with no capital gets punished"
so smart right!
the book!
ahhhh.
it makes so much sense.
totally
"we show our regard for human life by the adoption of a rule that he who violates that right in another forfeits it for himself"
"by imposing the death penalty on those who dare break the rule of existence, we affirm the dignity of every other individual"
BRILLIANT!
certaintly makes me question my existence.
pffft.
u dont know.
not at all.
well u nearly did but its best u never know.
i just hate it.
why everyone lies to me.
why nobody ever trusts me.
why i never trust anybody.
i guess nobody can be trusted.
not at all.
and it just comes back to the fact that im alone.
again.
again and again and again and again and again and again.
u just have to repeat it dont you.
im sick and tired of begging u to give me happiness.
u just have to show your dislike for me right before me right.
gosh.
i am highly highly highly highly highly pissed.
i have never been this poor in my whole life.
i hate being broke.
i guess i just have to sacrifice that hollister skirt.
BLEGH.
after yearning for it like so long.
well if i pay coach later then i can buy.
but nope.i shall not buy it.
im sure in kl i can find cheaper ones.
uhfvuevbniuntvgurtyebvufejkcjkfnjvbvufhiveifbgvguegnvoi
gosh.
i just cant stand it that u just have to raise my hopes and then dash them.
i hate sucking up to you and not get results.
i hate sucking up to you when i hate you like siao.
fkscgjndfsbhcdfysvfuydblscuf.ubw3iv tu
i shall never ever ever ever believe you wholeheartedly.
and never ever ever ever ever do things to please you.
i hate smiling at you and then turn behind and mutter "stupid fat pig"
gosh.
actually i dont even smile at you.
well
maybe when you raise my hopes of getting that pair of jeans.
so much for your big fat genorosity.
what happened to your promise of getting it for me.
apparently it matters so much that u forgot about it within 5 mins.
or maybe u are just feigning it.
from now on i shall just risk it and be happy.
i will not be your puppet ever again.
but i guess even if i escaped, i will still be yours.
a puppet will always belong to its master.
vhiiiiiignhurkbnvrp .
and yes.
now lets talk about her.
gosh.
do you know how much your nice daughter sticks to her?
obviously you do.
thats why u treat her like gold.
and treat me as trash.
no not as trash.
the worst thing is that u dont treat me like anything.
but then again.
i shldnt care.
considering that we dont know each other.
and we both pretend to be nice.
u just do her a favor and let me tag along yah.
and i just help her keep her face by smiling and greeting you.
not like ihave a choice.
but i guess i csan always change days,or take a bus and not bother you.
considering that we arnt even neighbours.
that we are total strangers.
choir concert was cool.next year and next next year and many years i will go!
we saw mabel junior.
speaking of juniors, what happened to anonymous ppl?
anyway.
i was pointing to mabel jnr in the hall, then jodee was like
bowing and saying GOOD MORNING.
yes.
IT WAS NIGHT TIME.
and she was greeting a teacher not mabel junior XD
she thought i was pointing to the teacher
loser lah XD
and im sure today she will do smth loser though she says she dint.
oh well.
AND I LOST MY BEAUTIFUL MONA LISA!
sheddjbfbcusncoues
now have to repaint and i have no materials at all.
bel canto sat beside simin!
was nice talking again.
perhaps sunday we'll be movie-ing.
but im broke so maybe i shant go for lunch?
and dfmceoivnuencrjnmvrn v
u dont know how much i hate it when u go overboard.
i know im nice.
but u dont have to take advantage of my magnanmity by being so irresponisble do you?
hah
and u thought it was funny.
even someone who knows me less well than you do could tell i was pissed.
sorry lah but i cant handle criticisms well.
i can, just not UNJUST ones.
but i guess seeing you just makes me forgive you.
i cant hold grudges for long.
trning tmr!
yay
2.4 was fun.
running in the rain!
rained last round and i was soaked.
i ran 12.37 mins.
yay.
i feel proud of myself though i could have done better if i had not been pisssed.
hehe
ms ong was leaving aready.
so i thought i had to re run and was pissed.
but i was like 1m away from finishing line so i ran there in case i dint have to.
then i stopped at ending line and was like:have to rerun!!!!!???
then they were all like RUN RUN RUN
then i was like HUH???
then i just ran.
i realised i havent reach ending line, 3m more XD
fortunately,
thanks to yuhui and huiqi!
they asked ms ong to wait for me!!!!
so i dint have to rerun.
then i was like happy when lisa came past
and she was like RUN DONT STOP
then i HUH
and half run half walk.
then i was hsouting for yu hui like siao but she dint hear.
cos lisa said i havent run finish
and i wasnt very sure either.
but in the end i decided that i probably ran finished le and so i went in to j blk.
soaked totally.
at bus stop.
it was flooded cos drain got clogged.
super cool lah!
was like a flash flood,
as in the cuurrents were strong!
and ppl screamed when lightnibg came.
and my shoes got SUBMERGED cos the water was ankle high!
anyway
was yesterday loser day or what.
jodee malu at acs,
jocelyne during recess also
cos i saw mrs koh by with styrofoam.
so the very environmentally friendly me was telling joce of how she teached geog and dint save the earth.
then joce was like: yah lorh, so much CPF.
then i HUH.
then she said: the thing that causes global warming!
then i realised it was CFCs! ! ! !
hahahaha.
then she was like :CPF LAH!WHATS CFC!?
haha.
i am depressed over the loss of mona lisa.
and i need to do lots of stuff
1. be more humble
2.be less greedy
3.have more dicipline
4.be smarter
5.be less mean
i think i can empathise everyone but my family.
pfft.
maybe cos i know them well enough that the WORLD PEACE THEORY doesnt work on them
actually i dont know them well at all.
and
dont tell me love makes the world go round.
money is realistically as impt.
thats why im pissed and depressed.
no money,not happy.
well.
u might then say that no money, got love will be happy,
but then,
what if i say theres no love AND money.
pffft.
NOW thats a reason for me to be unhappy.
so u cant say anything about being happy without money and just love.
she lives in a house, not a home
psmcnhvhvonckehoiu
idjxiebcuebxueubu4ciu34bfiubiuxbiu4hxiu4hx
ok.
i feel better spewing nonsense.
gosh.
but im still highly irritable.
and i honestly wished some ppl would leave me alone to rot and stop making things difficult for me.
its like...
OBVIOUSLY a trap for me to fall in.
and if i dont fall into that trap, i will just fall ino another.
either way u will just rip my life away.
AND THUS, i have decided to feign ignorance.
hah.
so now u will just think i fell into your trap or im ignorant.
well.
the uncertainty is enough.
but dont be sad if u think i fell into your trap :)
i bet u dont know what im talking about.
i must learn to make things more unidentifiable.
i love philosphy!
guess what
i borrowed a book on capital punishment though philo is over.
but its so cheem i read one page gave up.
i shall borrow another one onterrorism and racism!
"capital punishment means :anyone with no capital gets punished"
so smart right!
the book!
ahhhh.
it makes so much sense.
totally
"we show our regard for human life by the adoption of a rule that he who violates that right in another forfeits it for himself"
"by imposing the death penalty on those who dare break the rule of existence, we affirm the dignity of every other individual"
BRILLIANT!
certaintly makes me question my existence.
pffft.
u dont know.
not at all.
well u nearly did but its best u never know.
i just hate it.
why everyone lies to me.
why nobody ever trusts me.
why i never trust anybody.
i guess nobody can be trusted.
not at all.
and it just comes back to the fact that im alone.
again.
again and again and again and again and again and again.
u just have to repeat it dont you.
im sick and tired of begging u to give me happiness.
u just have to show your dislike for me right before me right.
gosh.
i am highly highly highly highly highly pissed.
i have never been this poor in my whole life.
i hate being broke.
i guess i just have to sacrifice that hollister skirt.
BLEGH.
after yearning for it like so long.
well if i pay coach later then i can buy.
but nope.i shall not buy it.
im sure in kl i can find cheaper ones.
uhfvuevbniuntvgurtyebvufejkcjkfnjvbvufhiveifbgvguegnvoi
gosh.
i just cant stand it that u just have to raise my hopes and then dash them.
i hate sucking up to you and not get results.
i hate sucking up to you when i hate you like siao.
fkscgjndfsbhcdfysvfuydblscuf.ubw3iv tu
i shall never ever ever ever believe you wholeheartedly.
and never ever ever ever ever do things to please you.
i hate smiling at you and then turn behind and mutter "stupid fat pig"
gosh.
actually i dont even smile at you.
well
maybe when you raise my hopes of getting that pair of jeans.
so much for your big fat genorosity.
what happened to your promise of getting it for me.
apparently it matters so much that u forgot about it within 5 mins.
or maybe u are just feigning it.
from now on i shall just risk it and be happy.
i will not be your puppet ever again.
but i guess even if i escaped, i will still be yours.
a puppet will always belong to its master.
vhiiiiiignhurkbnvrp .
and yes.
now lets talk about her.
gosh.
do you know how much your nice daughter sticks to her?
obviously you do.
thats why u treat her like gold.
and treat me as trash.
no not as trash.
the worst thing is that u dont treat me like anything.
but then again.
i shldnt care.
considering that we dont know each other.
and we both pretend to be nice.
u just do her a favor and let me tag along yah.
and i just help her keep her face by smiling and greeting you.
not like ihave a choice.
but i guess i csan always change days,or take a bus and not bother you.
considering that we arnt even neighbours.
that we are total strangers.
choir concert was cool.next year and next next year and many years i will go!
we saw mabel junior.
speaking of juniors, what happened to anonymous ppl?
anyway.
i was pointing to mabel jnr in the hall, then jodee was like
bowing and saying GOOD MORNING.
yes.
IT WAS NIGHT TIME.
and she was greeting a teacher not mabel junior XD
she thought i was pointing to the teacher
loser lah XD
and im sure today she will do smth loser though she says she dint.
oh well.
AND I LOST MY BEAUTIFUL MONA LISA!
sheddjbfbcusncoues
now have to repaint and i have no materials at all.
bel canto sat beside simin!
was nice talking again.
perhaps sunday we'll be movie-ing.
but im broke so maybe i shant go for lunch?
and dfmceoivnuencrjnmvrn v
u dont know how much i hate it when u go overboard.
i know im nice.
but u dont have to take advantage of my magnanmity by being so irresponisble do you?
hah
and u thought it was funny.
even someone who knows me less well than you do could tell i was pissed.
sorry lah but i cant handle criticisms well.
i can, just not UNJUST ones.
but i guess seeing you just makes me forgive you.
i cant hold grudges for long.
trning tmr!
yay
2.4 was fun.
running in the rain!
rained last round and i was soaked.
i ran 12.37 mins.
yay.
i feel proud of myself though i could have done better if i had not been pisssed.
hehe
ms ong was leaving aready.
so i thought i had to re run and was pissed.
but i was like 1m away from finishing line so i ran there in case i dint have to.
then i stopped at ending line and was like:have to rerun!!!!!???
then they were all like RUN RUN RUN
then i was like HUH???
then i just ran.
i realised i havent reach ending line, 3m more XD
fortunately,
thanks to yuhui and huiqi!
they asked ms ong to wait for me!!!!
so i dint have to rerun.
then i was like happy when lisa came past
and she was like RUN DONT STOP
then i HUH
and half run half walk.
then i was hsouting for yu hui like siao but she dint hear.
cos lisa said i havent run finish
and i wasnt very sure either.
but in the end i decided that i probably ran finished le and so i went in to j blk.
soaked totally.
at bus stop.
it was flooded cos drain got clogged.
super cool lah!
was like a flash flood,
as in the cuurrents were strong!
and ppl screamed when lightnibg came.
and my shoes got SUBMERGED cos the water was ankle high!
anyway
was yesterday loser day or what.
jodee malu at acs,
jocelyne during recess also
cos i saw mrs koh by with styrofoam.
so the very environmentally friendly me was telling joce of how she teached geog and dint save the earth.
then joce was like: yah lorh, so much CPF.
then i HUH.
then she said: the thing that causes global warming!
then i realised it was CFCs! ! ! !
hahahaha.
then she was like :CPF LAH!WHATS CFC!?
haha.
i am depressed over the loss of mona lisa.
and i need to do lots of stuff
1. be more humble
2.be less greedy
3.have more dicipline
4.be smarter
5.be less mean
i think i can empathise everyone but my family.
pfft.
maybe cos i know them well enough that the WORLD PEACE THEORY doesnt work on them
actually i dont know them well at all.
and
dont tell me love makes the world go round.
money is realistically as impt.
thats why im pissed and depressed.
no money,not happy.
well.
u might then say that no money, got love will be happy,
but then,
what if i say theres no love AND money.
pffft.
NOW thats a reason for me to be unhappy.
so u cant say anything about being happy without money and just love.
she lives in a house, not a home
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
ooohlala.
how come blogger the thingy become blue!!!
haha.
im feeeeling high!
5 items were satisfying.
yah.
i managed to get satisfying results.
at least i improved!
my IPU was very bad...
i totally wobbled and bent my knees when there was three more or so to get an A!!!!
thx mengxia for pushing me or else i would just get C or amth for IPU!
shuttle run was an improvement!
first time i ran, i saw three white lines so i dunno which one must run past.
so i run past all!
and wasted few seconds....
so i tried again.
and i was amazed with how pro i was XD
no lah...primary sch run slower lorh
anyway.
some teachers are just freaking unfair.
well.
unreasonable...
and i feel the unjust for my fellow classmates.
ok....
i think saying this just makes people think i am....
okay.
i shall not say it but i know that you know it.
well,
maybe i am.
but i doubt so.
oh oh oh.
the thingy has returned to normal!
its not blue anymore!
haha.
whatever
and whats her freaking fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffreaking problem.
hfoinvlwpm,smcwofnschacjkndposhoiaegnv.
i shall not lose my composure because of people like u who live just to serve as obstacles for ppl to overcome.
pffffft.
and vulgarities arnt cool.
at all.
i hate to say it but its seriously not your fault.
its just your environment.
GOSH.
bak to the world peace theory again.
OK.
now lets analyse this using a LOGICAL theory.
OF COURSE its your fault.
your environment is just an excuse i came up for you.
honestly.
i hate you that much but im still finding excuses for you?
GOSH.
OK OK OK.its ALL YOUR fault.
that u have no dicipline and mind of your own.
that u are so easily influenced by ppl around you.
BUT.
its really hard not to be influenced by your surroundings i guess....
considering how u have been in it for 10 years???
goooodness me.
i hated you like sssssssshkcnsodn just now and now i have forgiven you cos its just human nature to be affected by one's surroundings and its difficult to cultivate discipline...
maybe its good afterall.
that i dont get angry for long...
i dont care if my theory is wrong.
it makes me happier.
OK.
wait.
i do care if its wrong.
but
u have to admit is makes ppl happier.
RIGHT?
and whoever i was dsnconefnvbm about is not you.
yeah.
really!
its just sparked of with ONE SINGLE WORD.
yep.
u probably use it too...
or maybe its just that she used in ON ME WHEN I FREAKING DID NOTHING WRONG?!?!
ok.
maybe i was wrong but u dont have to say something like that.
ill-bred.
yes.
i am utterly embarrassed to be related to you.
OH WELL.
blood is thicker than water and its not your fault u turned out this way.
we were bred the same way...
OH WOW
that means it IS your fault.
cos i managed to steer myself in the right direction but u dint.
and we were bred the same way!
hah.
i know you dont understand what im saying.
nvm, i do!
hah.
whatever.
i shall not be angered by flies like you with brains drowning with water.
ooops.
flies have no brains!
oh gosh.i am downright mean.
but im glad i see you only in the evening.
so just prevents our relationship from detioriating anymore.
wait.
there was nothing to start with....
nvm, just keep out of my way and i will steer clear of you too.
then we will all be happy.
yah right.
im sure its this simple...
OH WILL I JUST STOP COMPLAINING!
anyway
i realised as usual
i dumbly did something dumb.
i handed up math assignment only to realise at home that the answers were still with me....
i just handed up the questions and graphs..........!!!
pfft.
anyway.
i ave an interesting problem today.
yay.
im sure i will have more self-knowledge after it!
oh.thats philo last year!!!
yayyyy!
anyway.
its just a test of my integrity.
and it just proves that all those delusional integrity i thougt i had actually never existed....
awwwwww.
really!
i know whats he right thing to do.
but i cant help but be tempted cos i know of my incompetency.
and besides everybody's doing the same so why shldn i?
well.
cos i shld have my own mind and not be influenced.
i am such a hypocrite...
to thing i was bitching about her absolute lack of her own mind just now...
GOSH
anyway!
i know i shldnt do what everybody's doing cos its wrong.
morally wrong.
but....
is so small scale!
but!
then again, despite the degree of it.
its still dishonesty!!!!
and i think i will feel guilty if i do it.
but the outcome will be good!
this is exactly what we learnt last year philo XD
haha.
anyway!
my purpose is good.
its for my own good.
selfish motive larh!
but
it wont harm anyone what!
except my own integrity....
but.
the means is also not harmful.
afterall.
i dint intend to do it at all.
but was offered it.
ahhhhhhhh.
it harms no one.
now all thats in my way is my integrity and conscience.
but PI LAH!
how far can integrity get me.
certaintly less than 1 metre lah.
this is soooooo small scale it wont matter much but
even if i uphold my integrity and all....which i THINK i have.or maybe its delusional,,,
i wont benefit.
aside from knowing i dint disappoint my conscience.
but reality is that if i dont be dishonest, i wont get as far as others can.
that is reality and belive it or not,
integrity doesnt determine success.
but i think i shld belive in myself and
uphold my integrity.
but then the issue at hand now is....
that i have integrity or rather i PRETEND to have, but i know that i wont be very guilty knowing i was dishonest....
so maybe i had not much integrity to start with.
cos deep down inside i know i wont mind being dishonest cos it benefits me...
honestly, i dont think i can differentiate between what i know is right and what i actually believe is right.
no.as in....
i believe that what is morally right IS right,
but its hard to do everything such that its perfectly morally right.
YES.
i got it.
all i have to do is try to do hings morally right!
gosh.
to think i took so long to figure that out
haha.
seriously.
im sure nobody ever
EVER
EVER
EVER
does think so much over a small act of dishonesty...
but.
to think i derived a conclusion....
i still dunno what to do.
i know what is right,
i SHOULD do whats right,
but
it doesnt benefit me much!
feeling better wont make up for knowing im the only fool who cared so much about integrity over real hard tangible good outcomes.
so it all boils down to tangible stuff being more impt then intangible stuff?
cos in reality,
everything is harsh and fake and all about competency.
no one cares if you are honest or not.
as in not no body cares.
but
its true that people wont go like " are u honest? if you are, i will employ you!"
okay...
honesty does matter.
but.
isnt it like a dog eat dog world out there?
if your boss knows u cheated or smth but clinched a big deal,
most likely he'll just close one eye right!
unless he/she has integrity that is.
but do u think he/she will call the police to rrest you just to uphold justice and do wats morally right.
and since he benefits but u did smth morally wrong, he shld call the police?
im sure there are ppl like that, but its such a small minority!
the majority dont give a dhjkhsvvj to integrity.
unless it involves their feelings etc where they will be at a disadvantage....
honestly.
if they were at a disadvantage, they definitely will condmn your dishonesty.
maybe this is called hypocrisy.
WOW
i managed to link my ideas up into a big big mind map!
i guess the whole main point that is in the middles of the map shld be smth like "THIS IS JUST THE WAY LIFE IS"
maybe that isnt broad enough but oh well.
im sick and tired of upholding my integrity.
no one cares.
no one bothers.
no one will bother to think about their integrity cos it isnt very impt.
sorry lah, im not condemning any of you.
REALLY.
im just trying to clear my thoughts and find out if i really have integrity.
somehow.
i think all this is just an act.
maybe i dont have integrity.
i thought i have, but maybe its cos i try to do whats right but i dont really belive in it but do it just cos its right?
andi thought we shld do hings which we believe in...
everything just boils down to : THIS WORLD MAKES NO SENSE.
oh it isnt meant to make sense
if humans were that easy to understand,
everyone would be plotting and scheming on how to kill each other.
or maybe thats what IS happening.
dog eat dog world.
whoever isnt ruthless will just lose out.
like whats happening to me right now.
maybe if everyone understood each other,
everyone wont kill each other but empathise and love each other!
yes!
thats why everyone is murderous now cos we dont understand each other!
wow. i realised that!
but it will never change cos no one will ever truely understand humans.
there is no right or wrong.
there is no truth to seek.
we all live life with no goals.
if theres no right and wrong,
where does integrity come in?
GOSH!!!!!!!
i am totally counter arguing my own arguments!
i think i make sense.
but i guess its all in my head and i dint really express myself coherently so its not your fault if u dont understand XD
OH WOW.
im experiencing internal debate over moral issues.
and apparently i just got proven right that everyone is dishonest .
i dont belive anybody dint ever be dishonest in his/her whole life before.
humans just exploiy each other and do nothing else.
that is so right!
im intellectual overnight!wheeeee
told you i would learn more after this internal debate!!!!!
i feel like i discovered something more about life and its meaning.
i feel weird when people tell me something which i dont know how to answer.
as in....
if i go "i ate dinner just now"
u will go like "errrrr.ok..."
cos its such a "whatever i dont care at all" thing to say.
yah.
just feels weird replying statements like that...
dont expect me to say smth like " oh.did u eat curry or what"
ok..........
im just expressing what i feel of weird statements
i think i write long posts cos i dont talk alot .
i express myself better in words?
so im really talking now just not verbally.
-____-
haha. that makes sense!
seriously i will never say out verbally most of the stuff i post
i think i just prefer to avoid direct contact with others
yes!
i am anti-social.
very.
and its causing me all the problems in the world.
vhnsuybviu
sheeesh
and just when i thought i figured out my life,
it turns out i havent been much clearer about anything.
all this thinking just wastes my time cos they dont solve my problems at all.
yep.
im still back in square one.
i guess life never advances.
only time does.
i love some things i say cos they are just so brilliant.
i am talkative.
just not verbally
XD
XD
XD
how come blogger the thingy become blue!!!
haha.
im feeeeling high!
5 items were satisfying.
yah.
i managed to get satisfying results.
at least i improved!
my IPU was very bad...
i totally wobbled and bent my knees when there was three more or so to get an A!!!!
thx mengxia for pushing me or else i would just get C or amth for IPU!
shuttle run was an improvement!
first time i ran, i saw three white lines so i dunno which one must run past.
so i run past all!
and wasted few seconds....
so i tried again.
and i was amazed with how pro i was XD
no lah...primary sch run slower lorh
anyway.
some teachers are just freaking unfair.
well.
unreasonable...
and i feel the unjust for my fellow classmates.
ok....
i think saying this just makes people think i am....
okay.
i shall not say it but i know that you know it.
well,
maybe i am.
but i doubt so.
oh oh oh.
the thingy has returned to normal!
its not blue anymore!
haha.
whatever
and whats her freaking fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffreaking problem.
hfoinvlwpm,smcwofnschacjkndposhoiaegnv.
i shall not lose my composure because of people like u who live just to serve as obstacles for ppl to overcome.
pffffft.
and vulgarities arnt cool.
at all.
i hate to say it but its seriously not your fault.
its just your environment.
GOSH.
bak to the world peace theory again.
OK.
now lets analyse this using a LOGICAL theory.
OF COURSE its your fault.
your environment is just an excuse i came up for you.
honestly.
i hate you that much but im still finding excuses for you?
GOSH.
OK OK OK.its ALL YOUR fault.
that u have no dicipline and mind of your own.
that u are so easily influenced by ppl around you.
BUT.
its really hard not to be influenced by your surroundings i guess....
considering how u have been in it for 10 years???
goooodness me.
i hated you like sssssssshkcnsodn just now and now i have forgiven you cos its just human nature to be affected by one's surroundings and its difficult to cultivate discipline...
maybe its good afterall.
that i dont get angry for long...
i dont care if my theory is wrong.
it makes me happier.
OK.
wait.
i do care if its wrong.
but
u have to admit is makes ppl happier.
RIGHT?
and whoever i was dsnconefnvbm about is not you.
yeah.
really!
its just sparked of with ONE SINGLE WORD.
yep.
u probably use it too...
or maybe its just that she used in ON ME WHEN I FREAKING DID NOTHING WRONG?!?!
ok.
maybe i was wrong but u dont have to say something like that.
ill-bred.
yes.
i am utterly embarrassed to be related to you.
OH WELL.
blood is thicker than water and its not your fault u turned out this way.
we were bred the same way...
OH WOW
that means it IS your fault.
cos i managed to steer myself in the right direction but u dint.
and we were bred the same way!
hah.
i know you dont understand what im saying.
nvm, i do!
hah.
whatever.
i shall not be angered by flies like you with brains drowning with water.
ooops.
flies have no brains!
oh gosh.i am downright mean.
but im glad i see you only in the evening.
so just prevents our relationship from detioriating anymore.
wait.
there was nothing to start with....
nvm, just keep out of my way and i will steer clear of you too.
then we will all be happy.
yah right.
im sure its this simple...
OH WILL I JUST STOP COMPLAINING!
anyway
i realised as usual
i dumbly did something dumb.
i handed up math assignment only to realise at home that the answers were still with me....
i just handed up the questions and graphs..........!!!
pfft.
anyway.
i ave an interesting problem today.
yay.
im sure i will have more self-knowledge after it!
oh.thats philo last year!!!
yayyyy!
anyway.
its just a test of my integrity.
and it just proves that all those delusional integrity i thougt i had actually never existed....
awwwwww.
really!
i know whats he right thing to do.
but i cant help but be tempted cos i know of my incompetency.
and besides everybody's doing the same so why shldn i?
well.
cos i shld have my own mind and not be influenced.
i am such a hypocrite...
to thing i was bitching about her absolute lack of her own mind just now...
GOSH
anyway!
i know i shldnt do what everybody's doing cos its wrong.
morally wrong.
but....
is so small scale!
but!
then again, despite the degree of it.
its still dishonesty!!!!
and i think i will feel guilty if i do it.
but the outcome will be good!
this is exactly what we learnt last year philo XD
haha.
anyway!
my purpose is good.
its for my own good.
selfish motive larh!
but
it wont harm anyone what!
except my own integrity....
but.
the means is also not harmful.
afterall.
i dint intend to do it at all.
but was offered it.
ahhhhhhhh.
it harms no one.
now all thats in my way is my integrity and conscience.
but PI LAH!
how far can integrity get me.
certaintly less than 1 metre lah.
this is soooooo small scale it wont matter much but
even if i uphold my integrity and all....which i THINK i have.or maybe its delusional,,,
i wont benefit.
aside from knowing i dint disappoint my conscience.
but reality is that if i dont be dishonest, i wont get as far as others can.
that is reality and belive it or not,
integrity doesnt determine success.
but i think i shld belive in myself and
uphold my integrity.
but then the issue at hand now is....
that i have integrity or rather i PRETEND to have, but i know that i wont be very guilty knowing i was dishonest....
so maybe i had not much integrity to start with.
cos deep down inside i know i wont mind being dishonest cos it benefits me...
honestly, i dont think i can differentiate between what i know is right and what i actually believe is right.
no.as in....
i believe that what is morally right IS right,
but its hard to do everything such that its perfectly morally right.
YES.
i got it.
all i have to do is try to do hings morally right!
gosh.
to think i took so long to figure that out
haha.
seriously.
im sure nobody ever
EVER
EVER
EVER
does think so much over a small act of dishonesty...
but.
to think i derived a conclusion....
i still dunno what to do.
i know what is right,
i SHOULD do whats right,
but
it doesnt benefit me much!
feeling better wont make up for knowing im the only fool who cared so much about integrity over real hard tangible good outcomes.
so it all boils down to tangible stuff being more impt then intangible stuff?
cos in reality,
everything is harsh and fake and all about competency.
no one cares if you are honest or not.
as in not no body cares.
but
its true that people wont go like " are u honest? if you are, i will employ you!"
okay...
honesty does matter.
but.
isnt it like a dog eat dog world out there?
if your boss knows u cheated or smth but clinched a big deal,
most likely he'll just close one eye right!
unless he/she has integrity that is.
but do u think he/she will call the police to rrest you just to uphold justice and do wats morally right.
and since he benefits but u did smth morally wrong, he shld call the police?
im sure there are ppl like that, but its such a small minority!
the majority dont give a dhjkhsvvj to integrity.
unless it involves their feelings etc where they will be at a disadvantage....
honestly.
if they were at a disadvantage, they definitely will condmn your dishonesty.
maybe this is called hypocrisy.
WOW
i managed to link my ideas up into a big big mind map!
i guess the whole main point that is in the middles of the map shld be smth like "THIS IS JUST THE WAY LIFE IS"
maybe that isnt broad enough but oh well.
im sick and tired of upholding my integrity.
no one cares.
no one bothers.
no one will bother to think about their integrity cos it isnt very impt.
sorry lah, im not condemning any of you.
REALLY.
im just trying to clear my thoughts and find out if i really have integrity.
somehow.
i think all this is just an act.
maybe i dont have integrity.
i thought i have, but maybe its cos i try to do whats right but i dont really belive in it but do it just cos its right?
andi thought we shld do hings which we believe in...
everything just boils down to : THIS WORLD MAKES NO SENSE.
oh it isnt meant to make sense
if humans were that easy to understand,
everyone would be plotting and scheming on how to kill each other.
or maybe thats what IS happening.
dog eat dog world.
whoever isnt ruthless will just lose out.
like whats happening to me right now.
maybe if everyone understood each other,
everyone wont kill each other but empathise and love each other!
yes!
thats why everyone is murderous now cos we dont understand each other!
wow. i realised that!
but it will never change cos no one will ever truely understand humans.
there is no right or wrong.
there is no truth to seek.
we all live life with no goals.
if theres no right and wrong,
where does integrity come in?
GOSH!!!!!!!
i am totally counter arguing my own arguments!
i think i make sense.
but i guess its all in my head and i dint really express myself coherently so its not your fault if u dont understand XD
OH WOW.
im experiencing internal debate over moral issues.
and apparently i just got proven right that everyone is dishonest .
i dont belive anybody dint ever be dishonest in his/her whole life before.
humans just exploiy each other and do nothing else.
that is so right!
im intellectual overnight!wheeeee
told you i would learn more after this internal debate!!!!!
i feel like i discovered something more about life and its meaning.
i feel weird when people tell me something which i dont know how to answer.
as in....
if i go "i ate dinner just now"
u will go like "errrrr.ok..."
cos its such a "whatever i dont care at all" thing to say.
yah.
just feels weird replying statements like that...
dont expect me to say smth like " oh.did u eat curry or what"
ok..........
im just expressing what i feel of weird statements
i think i write long posts cos i dont talk alot .
i express myself better in words?
so im really talking now just not verbally.
-____-
haha. that makes sense!
seriously i will never say out verbally most of the stuff i post
i think i just prefer to avoid direct contact with others
yes!
i am anti-social.
very.
and its causing me all the problems in the world.
vhnsuybviu
sheeesh
and just when i thought i figured out my life,
it turns out i havent been much clearer about anything.
all this thinking just wastes my time cos they dont solve my problems at all.
yep.
im still back in square one.
i guess life never advances.
only time does.
i love some things i say cos they are just so brilliant.
i am talkative.
just not verbally
XD
XD
XD
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
ooh
ooooh.
dunno why im ooohing.
but i wished i had gone for dinner on friday.
"When Your feeling alone like no one cares readthis cuz its absolutely true: Every night , someone thinks about you before they go to sleep, at least fifteen people in this world love you.The only reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.There are at least two people in this world that would die foryou. You mean the world to someone.Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look. Always remember the compliments you've received. Forget the rude remarks."
okay...you probably read it in your mail or something...
but i think this one is meaningful !!!
like anger management or smth XD
really what...................
oh wells.
i think its really...irritating to see ppl making use of others.
okay.forget that i said that.
anyway.
i nicely lent my geog textbook to jodeeeee.
so i cant study to day!
haha.
what an excuse.
i managed to finish my painting!
actually i watch tv and paint so its kind of ....not as nice as it should be.
tmr is 5 items.
im only worried for my sit and reach XD
is terrible.
i think i havent replied anthea's letter......
or maybe i lost it
or maybe i just posted it already?
sheeesh.
i think i tore it up or something out of boredom XD
i seriously have violent tendencies.
hah.
jodee's racquet is pretty.
but not very amazing.
but still better than my racquet.
which is cracking.
but i have no idea what racque to buy.
considering how limited choices i have.....
anyway.
i need a goal in life or i will never be able to choose the correct subject combination....
pffffft.
honestly, i wont mind taking 9 subjects XD
yes!
i am hardworking.
only if all are unexaminable...
oh well.
i have to solve THIS problem, and THAT one, and my racquet problem, and my shopping scheme problem, my math EOI problem, human relations problem with the whole wide world,
communication breakdown with ALOT of ppl, my DETENTION problem," the sight of her freaking pisses me" problem....
WOW
i just hate laughing all these off.
friday was....funny.
haha.
i know i am funny.
oh forget it.
rs is is so far a flop.
public relations tooo.
and my misconception of the whole wide world.
and my guilt is eating me whole.
no wonder i cant feel a thing.
i like studying XD
squashing is relatively boring except for saturdays.
OG was a big mistake.
and my judements have all proved me wrong.
i want a rainbow.
i nice bright one!
and yet again i found out more about others.
their problems which are bigger than mine.
i hate the silence in which i complain in day and night.
humans are really superficial.
and i am really shallow.
pffffft.
da chang jin is touching!
xin niang si ba sui toooo!
ahhhhh!
i realised i am getting more humane than ever.
yay!
it feels good to know i actually feel for others.
backstabbing should be illegal.
hypocrisy too.
mirrors too.
for they evoke jealousy and greed, and anger.
all the roots of evil.
humans should ease to exist for all contain some streak of un-good-ness.
chocalate and sweets make my day.
cheers to mNms and toberlone!
samosas too!
her smile's so wide,
she cant see a thing,
or maybe its just the tears in her eyes.
if i just make u unhappy, maybe i should disappear.
but if i disappeared i can never appear again.
so make your choice.
either way you will be happier without me.
im really sorry.
dunno why im ooohing.
but i wished i had gone for dinner on friday.
"When Your feeling alone like no one cares readthis cuz its absolutely true: Every night , someone thinks about you before they go to sleep, at least fifteen people in this world love you.The only reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.There are at least two people in this world that would die foryou. You mean the world to someone.Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look. Always remember the compliments you've received. Forget the rude remarks."
okay...you probably read it in your mail or something...
but i think this one is meaningful !!!
like anger management or smth XD
really what...................
oh wells.
i think its really...irritating to see ppl making use of others.
okay.forget that i said that.
anyway.
i nicely lent my geog textbook to jodeeeee.
so i cant study to day!
haha.
what an excuse.
i managed to finish my painting!
actually i watch tv and paint so its kind of ....not as nice as it should be.
tmr is 5 items.
im only worried for my sit and reach XD
is terrible.
i think i havent replied anthea's letter......
or maybe i lost it
or maybe i just posted it already?
sheeesh.
i think i tore it up or something out of boredom XD
i seriously have violent tendencies.
hah.
jodee's racquet is pretty.
but not very amazing.
but still better than my racquet.
which is cracking.
but i have no idea what racque to buy.
considering how limited choices i have.....
anyway.
i need a goal in life or i will never be able to choose the correct subject combination....
pffffft.
honestly, i wont mind taking 9 subjects XD
yes!
i am hardworking.
only if all are unexaminable...
oh well.
i have to solve THIS problem, and THAT one, and my racquet problem, and my shopping scheme problem, my math EOI problem, human relations problem with the whole wide world,
communication breakdown with ALOT of ppl, my DETENTION problem," the sight of her freaking pisses me" problem....
WOW
i just hate laughing all these off.
friday was....funny.
haha.
i know i am funny.
oh forget it.
rs is is so far a flop.
public relations tooo.
and my misconception of the whole wide world.
and my guilt is eating me whole.
no wonder i cant feel a thing.
i like studying XD
squashing is relatively boring except for saturdays.
OG was a big mistake.
and my judements have all proved me wrong.
i want a rainbow.
i nice bright one!
and yet again i found out more about others.
their problems which are bigger than mine.
i hate the silence in which i complain in day and night.
humans are really superficial.
and i am really shallow.
pffffft.
da chang jin is touching!
xin niang si ba sui toooo!
ahhhhh!
i realised i am getting more humane than ever.
yay!
it feels good to know i actually feel for others.
backstabbing should be illegal.
hypocrisy too.
mirrors too.
for they evoke jealousy and greed, and anger.
all the roots of evil.
humans should ease to exist for all contain some streak of un-good-ness.
chocalate and sweets make my day.
cheers to mNms and toberlone!
samosas too!
her smile's so wide,
she cant see a thing,
or maybe its just the tears in her eyes.
if i just make u unhappy, maybe i should disappear.
but if i disappeared i can never appear again.
so make your choice.
either way you will be happier without me.
im really sorry.
Thursday, April 27, 2006
chelsia's blog is nice!
greeeen is nice and greenish!
and do you know when you go over "squash" which is part of her loves, it says some thing like : "no, it is not a form of tennis -_-"
coooool right!
haha
but its linked to a squash website.
and the site states the history of squash :
"The origins of squash are in the ancient game of real tennis. In the twelfth century in France boys and girls played ball games in the narrow streets of their villages. They slapped balls along the awnings or roofs that lined the street or into shop and door openings."
"strung a fishing net across the middle of their courtyards and patted a ball back and forth with their gloved hands. The balls - a patch of leather with dog hair sewn inside, later cloth stuffed with soil, sawdust, sand or moss-bruised and cut hands. Monks added webbing to the gloves and then extended their hand by picking up a stumpy stick, a branch of a tree, a shepherd's crook. At the end of the fifteenth century the Dutch invented the racquet."
http://www.squash.org/
so cooool.
squash is sooo interesting :)
and its amazing how it began!
imagine using a tree branch to play squash.
how cool can that get!
but!!!!!!
wait!
it says "the game was called tennis" !?!?!?!
ahhhhhhhhhhh.
haha.
i think i am just bored...
i am not interested in doing homework -__-
but i have alot to do.
but nvm!
theres always tmr mrning XD
TURTLE POWER!
greeeen is nice and greenish!
and do you know when you go over "squash" which is part of her loves, it says some thing like : "no, it is not a form of tennis -_-"
coooool right!
haha
but its linked to a squash website.
and the site states the history of squash :
"The origins of squash are in the ancient game of real tennis. In the twelfth century in France boys and girls played ball games in the narrow streets of their villages. They slapped balls along the awnings or roofs that lined the street or into shop and door openings."
"strung a fishing net across the middle of their courtyards and patted a ball back and forth with their gloved hands. The balls - a patch of leather with dog hair sewn inside, later cloth stuffed with soil, sawdust, sand or moss-bruised and cut hands. Monks added webbing to the gloves and then extended their hand by picking up a stumpy stick, a branch of a tree, a shepherd's crook. At the end of the fifteenth century the Dutch invented the racquet."
http://www.squash.org/
so cooool.
squash is sooo interesting :)
and its amazing how it began!
imagine using a tree branch to play squash.
how cool can that get!
but!!!!!!
wait!
it says "the game was called tennis" !?!?!?!
ahhhhhhhhhhh.
haha.
i think i am just bored...
i am not interested in doing homework -__-
but i have alot to do.
but nvm!
theres always tmr mrning XD
TURTLE POWER!
oh my!
an amazing discovery i made :
our school shorts are amazing!
i love painting.
and i am disgusted by myself :)
jodee is soooo funny.
if anything lose-ish happens to her again.
i will cry for her XD
shopped around with her cos i dint want to go home
i ate 2 subway cookies.
and 2 samosas today!
im hungry now....
aiyahh.
ate ice cream for lunch :)
yay.
lit is nice.
jane is sooo intellectual.
me and jocelyne are shallow folks...
awwww.
excerpt from : Funeral Blues
"the stars are not wanted now: put out every one
pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
for nothing now can ever come to any good. "
W. H. Auden
i am disgusted with the reality of whats been happening.
how i have been behaving
i am sure of nothing but the fact that i am no longer sure of anything
an amazing discovery i made :
our school shorts are amazing!
i love painting.
and i am disgusted by myself :)
jodee is soooo funny.
if anything lose-ish happens to her again.
i will cry for her XD
shopped around with her cos i dint want to go home
i ate 2 subway cookies.
and 2 samosas today!
im hungry now....
aiyahh.
ate ice cream for lunch :)
yay.
lit is nice.
jane is sooo intellectual.
me and jocelyne are shallow folks...
awwww.
excerpt from : Funeral Blues
"the stars are not wanted now: put out every one
pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
for nothing now can ever come to any good. "
W. H. Auden
its so nice and sweet
i like elegies and sonnets and ballads!]
i am happy again.
except for some undescribable discoveries.
i hate being burdened with knowing truths only i know.
HEY!
did u know undescribable is a descriptive word???
haha XD
i am disgusted with the reality of whats been happening.
how i have been behaving
i am sure of nothing but the fact that i am no longer sure of anything
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
errrrrrrr xiiiiiiiiin
MOST DISGUSTING FACTS OF THE DAY.
QUOTED FROM ANTHEA:
"in the morning we saw the women drop the pao on the floor then later pick up with her BARE hands and put in back into the cage
its was so disgusting
then alot of ppl in front of her saw then she just go put back
and then later right all the people from the toilet come back and walk on the floor then all the toilet prints on the pao
also the people go step on dung then later alll on the pao
then also right all the dust eaten in your stomach
and then grow in your stomach
then later become stomach cancer
then later go hospital and then later have to pay alot of hospital bills
later die somemore
all because of that stupid pao."
ewwwwwwww.
yuck
oh nooooooooooooo
oh my goshhhhhhhhh!
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyer
today we dint get a single second of trning :(
ms neo paid us back :)
bad things happened :(
i dont understand people :(
today was a happy day
till more problems arose :(
whats with smileys :)
haha.
trning was pathtic.
mabel,cat,jodee,me.
juniors.
seniors.
mr yang.
ms neo.
aiyah....
tmr got art!
i like painting!
wheeee.
and i feel cheated.
hmph
eileeeeeeeen
why like that onee!!!!!!!
not fair lorh.
eeeeeeeeeeeeyer.
i am very bu shuang :)
haha.
bu shuang also smile ah.
aiyahhh.
but some things are indeed puzzling
HONESTLY
why cant everyone just try out my world peace theory.
if everyone does that.
there will be world peace!
i find disharmony utterly bothersome.
but i am happy nowadays!
yay.
i think my theory works for me even if it doesnt for you XD
toooooo badddd for you.
awwww.
somehow i seem to be the only person happy :(
told you to follow my theory!
hahahaha.
QUOTED FROM ANTHEA:
"in the morning we saw the women drop the pao on the floor then later pick up with her BARE hands and put in back into the cage
its was so disgusting
then alot of ppl in front of her saw then she just go put back
and then later right all the people from the toilet come back and walk on the floor then all the toilet prints on the pao
also the people go step on dung then later alll on the pao
then also right all the dust eaten in your stomach
and then grow in your stomach
then later become stomach cancer
then later go hospital and then later have to pay alot of hospital bills
later die somemore
all because of that stupid pao."
ewwwwwwww.
yuck
oh nooooooooooooo
oh my goshhhhhhhhh!
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyer
today we dint get a single second of trning :(
ms neo paid us back :)
bad things happened :(
i dont understand people :(
today was a happy day
till more problems arose :(
whats with smileys :)
haha.
trning was pathtic.
mabel,cat,jodee,me.
juniors.
seniors.
mr yang.
ms neo.
aiyah....
tmr got art!
i like painting!
wheeee.
and i feel cheated.
hmph
eileeeeeeeen
why like that onee!!!!!!!
not fair lorh.
eeeeeeeeeeeeyer.
i am very bu shuang :)
haha.
bu shuang also smile ah.
aiyahhh.
but some things are indeed puzzling
HONESTLY
why cant everyone just try out my world peace theory.
if everyone does that.
there will be world peace!
i find disharmony utterly bothersome.
but i am happy nowadays!
yay.
i think my theory works for me even if it doesnt for you XD
toooooo badddd for you.
awwww.
somehow i seem to be the only person happy :(
told you to follow my theory!
hahahaha.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
yay!
i was happy again today.
yay.
until i got generally annoyed by someone.
anyway.
i love samosas!
even if there is hair in it.
yes valerie!
you must learn to curb your fear by confronting it:)
it yummmmmy.
and and and.
my posts were jammed yesterdaybut they are fine now.
yay.
i think first time im blogging at this hour.
but oh well.
i just wrote 3 times of my ting xie correction.
write like siao.
i feel happy cos i completed my homework.
actually.
i dint do the chinese ws cos i dint bring the thingy home or i lost it or maybe i dont have it at all.
haha.
and i was going to do graphmatica but i got distracted :)
and i havent done history pt i was supposed to complete by today.
i am not achieving my goals :(
my timeline/organiser is not working.
oh well.
trning tmr.
after that must chiong home to do history pt!
i like my file.
but its blue.
not yellow.
but its a nice blue anyway:)
and its cool and antique and useful.
rs was relatively interesting.
i read a chinese comic which was fairytale like.
haha.
and jodee dint know the sequence of reading it when i asked her.
but i brilliantly figured it myself.
and her onstant interruption with funny really funny and witty comics was haha funny.
how repetetive :)
literature is interesting.
so is geog!
trning today wasnt very fruitful
cept that i seemed to have perfected tyco cross court above tin drives:)
but its accidental lah.
and cross court drops front the back :)
tyco lah.really.
jodee's drives are power man.
so cooooooool.
i am way not strong lah
tmr got pe.
it isnt very interesting cos the pace is really slow.
everyone moves slowly.
mrs anis talks slowly.
we play slowly.
super slow motion.
haha.
i believe in my theory that nobody is wrong.its all nature's fault!
haha.
maybe not.
but it makes me happier and if everyone believes in it,
everyone will be happy.
so believe in it!
jodee calls it world peace macro-concept:)
its illogical but happy!
its nobody's fault they are like that.
its their nature so we cant blame them!
seeeeee.
so nobody is ever wrong :)
and so u wont blame ppl.
so u are happy.
everyone happy.
jodee is a very intelligent person i realised
i hate arguing with her.
cos i always lose.
her arguments are so indept....
make me feel ultra shallow -___-
nvm.
must spar more with her.
than can hone my argumentative skills!
jodee thinks alot and very deeeeeep.
she is amazing!
just an example of why we shldnt judge a book by its cover XD
happy world.
yay!
i am not very emphatetic i realised.
i am an owl!
a confronting person.
cle was interesting.
bout conflicts resolution.
nga man just found out smth cool bout my name.
4/5 letters make up the word "alien"
coooool rite!
i knew i had alot to say but i cant rmb :(
i havent done graphmatica yet.
shhhhhhh.....eeeesh
oh oh ooh.
i think if i figured out what mr lim said during philo last year, i would understand everything
or at least.
i would know my principle's in life.
i think i need to sort out what i defines as morally right and what isnt.
i think jodee's pro at that
no wonder shes philo rep :)
philo today was nice.
is life a right or an obligation.
isit a part of us that cant be removed.
or just a private property that can be disposed anytime.
i cant rmb what i wanted to say!!!!
i think i cant be bothred with whats happening.
cos i am just going about in circles.
aiiiiiiiyahhhhhh
yay.
until i got generally annoyed by someone.
anyway.
i love samosas!
even if there is hair in it.
yes valerie!
you must learn to curb your fear by confronting it:)
it yummmmmy.
and and and.
my posts were jammed yesterdaybut they are fine now.
yay.
i think first time im blogging at this hour.
but oh well.
i just wrote 3 times of my ting xie correction.
write like siao.
i feel happy cos i completed my homework.
actually.
i dint do the chinese ws cos i dint bring the thingy home or i lost it or maybe i dont have it at all.
haha.
and i was going to do graphmatica but i got distracted :)
and i havent done history pt i was supposed to complete by today.
i am not achieving my goals :(
my timeline/organiser is not working.
oh well.
trning tmr.
after that must chiong home to do history pt!
i like my file.
but its blue.
not yellow.
but its a nice blue anyway:)
and its cool and antique and useful.
rs was relatively interesting.
i read a chinese comic which was fairytale like.
haha.
and jodee dint know the sequence of reading it when i asked her.
but i brilliantly figured it myself.
and her onstant interruption with funny really funny and witty comics was haha funny.
how repetetive :)
literature is interesting.
so is geog!
trning today wasnt very fruitful
cept that i seemed to have perfected tyco cross court above tin drives:)
but its accidental lah.
and cross court drops front the back :)
tyco lah.really.
jodee's drives are power man.
so cooooooool.
i am way not strong lah
tmr got pe.
it isnt very interesting cos the pace is really slow.
everyone moves slowly.
mrs anis talks slowly.
we play slowly.
super slow motion.
haha.
i believe in my theory that nobody is wrong.its all nature's fault!
haha.
maybe not.
but it makes me happier and if everyone believes in it,
everyone will be happy.
so believe in it!
jodee calls it world peace macro-concept:)
its illogical but happy!
its nobody's fault they are like that.
its their nature so we cant blame them!
seeeeee.
so nobody is ever wrong :)
and so u wont blame ppl.
so u are happy.
everyone happy.
jodee is a very intelligent person i realised
i hate arguing with her.
cos i always lose.
her arguments are so indept....
make me feel ultra shallow -___-
nvm.
must spar more with her.
than can hone my argumentative skills!
jodee thinks alot and very deeeeeep.
she is amazing!
just an example of why we shldnt judge a book by its cover XD
happy world.
yay!
i am not very emphatetic i realised.
i am an owl!
a confronting person.
cle was interesting.
bout conflicts resolution.
nga man just found out smth cool bout my name.
4/5 letters make up the word "alien"
coooool rite!
i knew i had alot to say but i cant rmb :(
i havent done graphmatica yet.
shhhhhhh.....eeeesh
oh oh ooh.
i think if i figured out what mr lim said during philo last year, i would understand everything
or at least.
i would know my principle's in life.
i think i need to sort out what i defines as morally right and what isnt.
i think jodee's pro at that
no wonder shes philo rep :)
philo today was nice.
is life a right or an obligation.
isit a part of us that cant be removed.
or just a private property that can be disposed anytime.
i cant rmb what i wanted to say!!!!
i think i cant be bothred with whats happening.
cos i am just going about in circles.
aiiiiiiiyahhhhhh
Monday, April 24, 2006
like totally:)
i am happy today:)
yay.
honestly, i prefer very much to train with cat,eden,eileen,jo.
than with seniors:)
i enjoyed trning today.
yay.
though we had like....
20mins of trning for 7 ppl in total?
nvm.i dont think i really care....
doesnt make much difference.
and waicheng is funny!
she was like why is so sad.
then i was like: huh?
then she said my nick was like sad....
then i was more puzzled.
whats so sad about potatoes?
turns out we are talking bout different things XD
trning was scary.
tianyi was very intimidating.
kept screaming and shouting my name.
and holding up paper with information about anthea -____-
scary scary scary.
and ask me weird weird questions which i doubted anthea really asked.
that just proves that
seniors were right to dao us last time so we will respect them XD
i shall try to dao juniors form now on.
so they will respect me!
haha.
otherwise they will climb to the top of my head.
but i think im too tall for them to reach me XD
oh what crapp!
but its true.
tianyi is ultra scary and intimidating!!!!
haha.
babies are cute!
and i got a new yellow cup with sheep on it!
i am happy today.
wheeee
apparently anthea fainted.
but tianyi exaggerate like siao.
tumble down stairs horh....
im sure lorh.
she dint even faint.
thats what anthea says.
and ask me whether im concerned -___-
say anthea needs my emotional support.
i dont believe anthea will say that!
its just their extra pepper and salt to make the whole thing interesting!
but
oh well.
juniors are scary!!!
there anonymous and anon whoever u are!
oh my goodness.
i thought i just saw joce's display pic move!
scary lah.
the clouds were moving!!!!!
and she has completed her history pt.
i havent.
die lah.
chem today i minus 4 marks le.
but it was okay....
oh.
and
tianyi claims people who wear mini skirts think they are sexy -____-
i feel insulted >< face="georgia" color="#000000" size="1">and nope.i say whatever i can tell which u want to know.and if its a secret, too bad.and sorry, but i keep to my promises.its not my fault.but if i say she will be angry.and i will be angry with my own dishonesty,and if i dont, only u will be frustrated.so its called utilitarianism :)
i believe in utilitarianism.really!
oh and i cant stand it when people dont believe me and im the only one who knows i am telling the truth.
maybe its cos i use"really" too often XD
and maybe i dont sound convincing due to my inability to express myself coherently :)
i am a hypocrite sometimes.
that i must admit.
and i welcome constructive criticisms :)
i think i have become a much better person after listening to what people think of me.
compared to my primary school days,
i am a way nicer person.
at least thats what i think:)
but i have definitely become less selfish :)
yay!
and i think if not for how others have been nice to me which makes me learn from them
(cos i will be guilty and learn to treat them as nicely as they treat me) , and also from all the failed friendships, i wouldnt have improved so much in character.
so whether u are friend or foe, i guess i have to thank you :)
and i think my thinking is seriously warped.
really!!!!!
everything is nature's fault, and its never ever someone's fault, cos its just their nature.
i think i need to start blaming ppl for what they do.
but isnt that as good as breeding hate.
and is breeding hate a way of accepting reality.
oh no.
i am thinking so logically i can write an essay for philo:)
which reminds me i have not done my hw for today.
EILEEEEEEEEEN CAN CONTINUE SQUASH! YAY YAY YAY!
i am happy today:)
thx to weird juniors, funny team mates and myself for making my day so wonderful!
ooooooooooh.
it feeeeels good to be happy XD
i think i have found her at the lost and found corner.
do you think so?
yay.
honestly, i prefer very much to train with cat,eden,eileen,jo.
than with seniors:)
i enjoyed trning today.
yay.
though we had like....
20mins of trning for 7 ppl in total?
nvm.i dont think i really care....
doesnt make much difference.
and waicheng is funny!
she was like why is so sad.
then i was like: huh?
then she said my nick was like sad....
then i was more puzzled.
whats so sad about potatoes?
turns out we are talking bout different things XD
trning was scary.
tianyi was very intimidating.
kept screaming and shouting my name.
and holding up paper with information about anthea -____-
scary scary scary.
and ask me weird weird questions which i doubted anthea really asked.
that just proves that
seniors were right to dao us last time so we will respect them XD
i shall try to dao juniors form now on.
so they will respect me!
haha.
otherwise they will climb to the top of my head.
but i think im too tall for them to reach me XD
oh what crapp!
but its true.
tianyi is ultra scary and intimidating!!!!
haha.
babies are cute!
and i got a new yellow cup with sheep on it!
i am happy today.
wheeee
apparently anthea fainted.
but tianyi exaggerate like siao.
tumble down stairs horh....
im sure lorh.
she dint even faint.
thats what anthea says.
and ask me whether im concerned -___-
say anthea needs my emotional support.
i dont believe anthea will say that!
its just their extra pepper and salt to make the whole thing interesting!
but
oh well.
juniors are scary!!!
there anonymous and anon whoever u are!
oh my goodness.
i thought i just saw joce's display pic move!
scary lah.
the clouds were moving!!!!!
and she has completed her history pt.
i havent.
die lah.
chem today i minus 4 marks le.
but it was okay....
oh.
and
tianyi claims people who wear mini skirts think they are sexy -____-
i feel insulted >< face="georgia" color="#000000" size="1">and nope.i say whatever i can tell which u want to know.and if its a secret, too bad.and sorry, but i keep to my promises.its not my fault.but if i say she will be angry.and i will be angry with my own dishonesty,and if i dont, only u will be frustrated.so its called utilitarianism :)
i believe in utilitarianism.really!
oh and i cant stand it when people dont believe me and im the only one who knows i am telling the truth.
maybe its cos i use"really" too often XD
and maybe i dont sound convincing due to my inability to express myself coherently :)
i am a hypocrite sometimes.
that i must admit.
and i welcome constructive criticisms :)
i think i have become a much better person after listening to what people think of me.
compared to my primary school days,
i am a way nicer person.
at least thats what i think:)
but i have definitely become less selfish :)
yay!
and i think if not for how others have been nice to me which makes me learn from them
(cos i will be guilty and learn to treat them as nicely as they treat me) , and also from all the failed friendships, i wouldnt have improved so much in character.
so whether u are friend or foe, i guess i have to thank you :)
and i think my thinking is seriously warped.
really!!!!!
everything is nature's fault, and its never ever someone's fault, cos its just their nature.
i think i need to start blaming ppl for what they do.
but isnt that as good as breeding hate.
and is breeding hate a way of accepting reality.
oh no.
i am thinking so logically i can write an essay for philo:)
which reminds me i have not done my hw for today.
EILEEEEEEEEEN CAN CONTINUE SQUASH! YAY YAY YAY!
i am happy today:)
thx to weird juniors, funny team mates and myself for making my day so wonderful!
ooooooooooh.
it feeeeels good to be happy XD
i think i have found her at the lost and found corner.
do you think so?
Sunday, April 23, 2006
ohhhhhhh nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
sheesh.
tmr is chem test.
20% lorh.
and i barely started mugging.
hah.
and here i am blogging.
i shall watch tv till 8pm then i shall mug.
and i dint listen in class at all.
i am in deep trouble.
and my life is boring.
nothing unusual ever happens lorh.
sigh.
maybe problems spice up my life!
yes.
they do make life exciting.
but i dont think i want to find problems...
what am i crapping...
oh well.
why do all the same problems happen again and again.
maybe we just dont learn form our mistakes.
and how can such things be fostered.
must be willing parties what.
and i thought it was supposed to happen naturally.
not by talks.
but since things have taken such a turn.
i guess thats the best we can do.
afterall, what do you expect of 10+ young girls to do :)
i make us sound so young.
yay.
reminds me of how coach is near 1oo years old.
since we round up her age XD
and mr lee tooooooo.
and so we are all just new-born kids:)
haha.
another weird logic of mine.
oh well.
disharmony doesnt happen for no reason.
and all the reasons are just minute petty details.
sometimes.
i am just to small hearted.
i shall learn to be magnanimous and accept ppl for who they are.
i seriously have a lot to learn.
i think i am far from being near perfect.
awwwwwwww.
sheesh.
tmr is chem test.
20% lorh.
and i barely started mugging.
hah.
and here i am blogging.
i shall watch tv till 8pm then i shall mug.
and i dint listen in class at all.
i am in deep trouble.
and my life is boring.
nothing unusual ever happens lorh.
sigh.
maybe problems spice up my life!
yes.
they do make life exciting.
but i dont think i want to find problems...
what am i crapping...
oh well.
why do all the same problems happen again and again.
maybe we just dont learn form our mistakes.
and how can such things be fostered.
must be willing parties what.
and i thought it was supposed to happen naturally.
not by talks.
but since things have taken such a turn.
i guess thats the best we can do.
afterall, what do you expect of 10+ young girls to do :)
i make us sound so young.
yay.
reminds me of how coach is near 1oo years old.
since we round up her age XD
and mr lee tooooooo.
and so we are all just new-born kids:)
haha.
another weird logic of mine.
oh well.
disharmony doesnt happen for no reason.
and all the reasons are just minute petty details.
sometimes.
i am just to small hearted.
i shall learn to be magnanimous and accept ppl for who they are.
i seriously have a lot to learn.
i think i am far from being near perfect.
awwwwwwww.
Saturday, April 22, 2006
reading thru my archives.
and i realised
my problems from last month are like still there.
and i still feel the same way.
i am just as unhappy as ever.
and honestly, nobody can be trusted.
and it was one of my saddest mistake to trust you.
and.
and.
and.
i am tired and sick of thinking so much.
afterall no matter how much i think
i still get no answer.
i just feel sadder.
i just realise more sad truths.
i think i am thinking too much that i am often lost in my thoughts so i am always stoning and quiet.
love does solve all problems.
i dare you to disagree.
hah.
or maybe everyone is filled with love its just the amt.?
and it depends on whether you look at the amt of love someone has, or the amt of hate.
but maybe i am just qiang3 si1 duo3 li3 (i think its the correct phrase?)
and i am just finding excuses for bad ppl to say they are good.
or maybe i just put myself in their shoes too much.
i wished your shoes were easier to fit in.
cos i just cant understand your point of view and so i am just pissing you off.
and i wished things dint change so much.
and i have found a new target.
but i dont think i will ever dare to have such high hopes again.
so perhaps i will just let the opportunity pass.
i rather miss a chance at happiness than risk getting unhappiness.
FOR GOODNESS SAKE.
why cant i just learn to take risks.
-______-
i am a total loser.
and i realised
my problems from last month are like still there.
and i still feel the same way.
i am just as unhappy as ever.
and honestly, nobody can be trusted.
and it was one of my saddest mistake to trust you.
and.
and.
and.
i am tired and sick of thinking so much.
afterall no matter how much i think
i still get no answer.
i just feel sadder.
i just realise more sad truths.
i think i am thinking too much that i am often lost in my thoughts so i am always stoning and quiet.
love does solve all problems.
i dare you to disagree.
hah.
or maybe everyone is filled with love its just the amt.?
and it depends on whether you look at the amt of love someone has, or the amt of hate.
but maybe i am just qiang3 si1 duo3 li3 (i think its the correct phrase?)
and i am just finding excuses for bad ppl to say they are good.
or maybe i just put myself in their shoes too much.
i wished your shoes were easier to fit in.
cos i just cant understand your point of view and so i am just pissing you off.
and i wished things dint change so much.
and i have found a new target.
but i dont think i will ever dare to have such high hopes again.
so perhaps i will just let the opportunity pass.
i rather miss a chance at happiness than risk getting unhappiness.
FOR GOODNESS SAKE.
why cant i just learn to take risks.
-______-
i am a total loser.
pffffft
assembly yesterday was nice
the performance by elds was funny as usual.
i think their medleys ae always super cool.
the "just imagine" sand fantasy thingy was the coolest thing ever.
the video of the pictures of our earth were so coool!
very touching:)
and it just made me realise how much there is out there to explore.
and i dont know 90% things that everyone knows.
i am so totally living unhappily in my so totally super small world.
I WANT TO GLOBETROT!
i totally love geog:)
yes!
i want to film documentaries next time!
yay!
i just love pictures.
they speak much more than words do.
they touch the heart.
they totally capture the moment when our minds cant.
they make happiness last eternally.
i just cant help but swoon at the amazing wonders there are in the world.
here i am gushing about how wonderful photographs videos and sand are, when there are so many more wonderful things i dont know about.
and i think its really sad that shu fang is not receptive to the treatment.
and she in such critical condition and she still thinks about helping others.
she is just another wonder of the world.
she is so brave and admirable.
and i think we should all learn from her.
to be selfless.
generous.
thoughtful.
brave.
strong.
yes.
and all i have ever been doing is complaining about my pathetic problems.
compared to her, my problems are nothing.
she wants to live, but cannot make the decision herself.
and people all over are committing suicide and thinking of dying over unimportant exams.
they can choose to die or live,
but all she can do is wait in the hope of a miracle.
lets all pray miracles do happen.
and sheer determination can overcome anything.
lets just hope.
love does solve all probelms.
i cant think of any problem too great that love cant solve
the performance by elds was funny as usual.
i think their medleys ae always super cool.
the "just imagine" sand fantasy thingy was the coolest thing ever.
the video of the pictures of our earth were so coool!
very touching:)
and it just made me realise how much there is out there to explore.
and i dont know 90% things that everyone knows.
i am so totally living unhappily in my so totally super small world.
I WANT TO GLOBETROT!
i totally love geog:)
yes!
i want to film documentaries next time!
yay!
i just love pictures.
they speak much more than words do.
they touch the heart.
they totally capture the moment when our minds cant.
they make happiness last eternally.
i just cant help but swoon at the amazing wonders there are in the world.
here i am gushing about how wonderful photographs videos and sand are, when there are so many more wonderful things i dont know about.
and i think its really sad that shu fang is not receptive to the treatment.
and she in such critical condition and she still thinks about helping others.
she is just another wonder of the world.
she is so brave and admirable.
and i think we should all learn from her.
to be selfless.
generous.
thoughtful.
brave.
strong.
yes.
and all i have ever been doing is complaining about my pathetic problems.
compared to her, my problems are nothing.
she wants to live, but cannot make the decision herself.
and people all over are committing suicide and thinking of dying over unimportant exams.
they can choose to die or live,
but all she can do is wait in the hope of a miracle.
lets all pray miracles do happen.
and sheer determination can overcome anything.
lets just hope.
love does solve all probelms.
i cant think of any problem too great that love cant solve
Thursday, April 20, 2006
sheesh
oh man.
i konked my head.
again!
this morning fell asleep in the bus....
then my head whammed the metal bar.
the part wbetween my eyeball and eyebrow is not bruised.
yuck.
ouch.
ewwww.
sheesh.
i am always getting konked nowhere but the head.
this explains why i am getting dumber.
my brain cells are dying!
and mabel!
perhaps we are less motivated cos....
we dont have anybody to prove ourselves too?
aside from ourselves that is.
and maybe...
like no more comps and different coach...
we dont have that high an expectation anymore?
basically we are just slacking lah.
or maybe just me...
and maybe partly also not motivated.
need more self-motivation and aspirations?
hmmmm.
i dunno lah.
my brain cant think that indept le....
i want to eat doughnuts!
i konked my head.
again!
this morning fell asleep in the bus....
then my head whammed the metal bar.
the part wbetween my eyeball and eyebrow is not bruised.
yuck.
ouch.
ewwww.
sheesh.
i am always getting konked nowhere but the head.
this explains why i am getting dumber.
my brain cells are dying!
and mabel!
perhaps we are less motivated cos....
we dont have anybody to prove ourselves too?
aside from ourselves that is.
and maybe...
like no more comps and different coach...
we dont have that high an expectation anymore?
basically we are just slacking lah.
or maybe just me...
and maybe partly also not motivated.
need more self-motivation and aspirations?
hmmmm.
i dunno lah.
my brain cant think that indept le....
i want to eat doughnuts!
i love beatboxing
it is the coolest thing ever ever ever.
xiao zhu is super cool too.
as cool as lin jun jie!
ooooooooh my goodness.
i think sonnet 18 is a very nice literary piece:)
its like...the language used is so wow.
very skilfully crafted.
its sooooo nice.
very romantic and brilliant and amazing and amazing.
its so cool!
!!!!!!EDIT!!!!!!!
oh nooooo. i dint realise its written to a guy.
gay-ism lorh...yuck.
but its still really sweet :)
but sick and gayish.
probably gay ppl are succesful.
so if u want to be succesful, be gay.
hah.i am crapping up some kind of illogical logic!
according to the reader's digest thingy.
i have a female brain :)
yay.
but i think balanced brain is the best?
oh well.
some of the questions i just guessed.
hee hee.
maybe i have a male brain:D
and according to rd,
i am a shy person!
so accurate.
and according to the book thingy in popular,
i am a person who dunno what dunno what i cant rmb but i know its true.
haha.
but i dont believe in whatever it is thing in newspapers where they tell u what kind of week u are going to have according to ur zodiac or smth?
oh well.
i think geog is super interesting!!!!
my dream home is somewhere on the mountains
with a hill behind my hse.
and a stream.
waterfall.
forest.
seaview.
yes!
haha.
then i will be a hermit.
waahaha.
yuck.
then there will be wolves and tigers at night!
i dont want to be eaten!
hah.
and most importantly must have a mall nearby!
wheeeeeee.
yes!
i want to live in such a place.
but it probably doesnt exist
not even in heaven.
how can there be a sea, waterfall, stream, forest in one place.
oh well.
dreaming isnt a sin.
i shall just live in my dreams :)
today was a stupid and boring day.
maybe cos i was unenthu.
oh well.
i dont like seeing____.
or maybe im just ...
forget it.
whats my problem.
i love painting!
and i can paint lorh.
but i cant draw very well ><
jj and piggy are so cooooooool!
oh my.
it is the coolest thing ever ever ever.
xiao zhu is super cool too.
as cool as lin jun jie!
ooooooooh my goodness.
i think sonnet 18 is a very nice literary piece:)
its like...the language used is so wow.
very skilfully crafted.
its sooooo nice.
very romantic and brilliant and amazing and amazing.
its so cool!
!!!!!!EDIT!!!!!!!
oh nooooo. i dint realise its written to a guy.
gay-ism lorh...yuck.
but its still really sweet :)
but sick and gayish.
probably gay ppl are succesful.
so if u want to be succesful, be gay.
hah.i am crapping up some kind of illogical logic!
according to the reader's digest thingy.
i have a female brain :)
yay.
but i think balanced brain is the best?
oh well.
some of the questions i just guessed.
hee hee.
maybe i have a male brain:D
and according to rd,
i am a shy person!
so accurate.
and according to the book thingy in popular,
i am a person who dunno what dunno what i cant rmb but i know its true.
haha.
but i dont believe in whatever it is thing in newspapers where they tell u what kind of week u are going to have according to ur zodiac or smth?
oh well.
i think geog is super interesting!!!!
my dream home is somewhere on the mountains
with a hill behind my hse.
and a stream.
waterfall.
forest.
seaview.
yes!
haha.
then i will be a hermit.
waahaha.
yuck.
then there will be wolves and tigers at night!
i dont want to be eaten!
hah.
and most importantly must have a mall nearby!
wheeeeeee.
yes!
i want to live in such a place.
but it probably doesnt exist
not even in heaven.
how can there be a sea, waterfall, stream, forest in one place.
oh well.
dreaming isnt a sin.
i shall just live in my dreams :)
today was a stupid and boring day.
maybe cos i was unenthu.
oh well.
i dont like seeing____.
or maybe im just ...
forget it.
whats my problem.
i love painting!
and i can paint lorh.
but i cant draw very well ><
jj and piggy are so cooooooool!
oh my.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
ooooohmegoooodnessssss
ooooooooh
i like going to school now.
yay!
but probably next week i wont.
with all those tests coming.
i am going to fail chem and math
again
anyway.
today i had lunch at 5pm!
but i wasnt starving lah....
drank too much air le.
stayed back to help paintthe front door.
cos no body stayed back except for:
joce, me, alethea, casslyn, rachel.livia, jieying,madeline?,
if i left out anyone, sorry.
but they are all nice helpful ppl!
the others were all busy.
so we stayed for 3 hrs to piant and paint and paint.
was tiring and boring.
and with me and csslyn's artistic ability,
we kept ruining the thing!
haha.
but it was fun crapping and laughing.
esp with noisy casslyn who talk so much and keep painting wrongly.
i am happy today!
finally!
and i like arguing with casslyn.
it makes me happy.
cos shes the only one i can ever win.
well sort of:)
and i was vert thrilled.
the excitement of shopping made me high.
though i was rather tired.
PE ran 1.6km in 8.3 mins.
though jocelyne was kinda hyperventilating or rather breathing loudly and scarily.
so i dint dare to leave her behind.
but she still managed to run very fast.she rested like 5 secs only :)
oooh.
i bought mabel's present.
which burned a whole in my pocket :)
ms neo owes me a freaking 20 bucks!!!!!!!!
and mabel's present is cuteeeeeee
very.
i want it for myself.
but i would be guilty spurging on something for myself.
but i am jealous cos i havent bought anything for myself except food for like ages.
and suddenly buy spend on something for someone...
nevermind.
i think i have finally truely felt the joy of giving now.
yay.
as in really seriously im not lying.
i feel happy buying mabel a present.
and i hope she likes it :)
me and jocelyne also sourced for val's present.
and we thought of something super innovative.
joce rather.
i cant think of something like that....
but its gonna make her fat XD
its a sinful indulgence :)
i feeel happyy.
im broke le.
yay
still have to buy jocelyne present
eileen's really belated one.
jodee's? hers havent come yet lah.
coming then she will remind me one horh ?
haha.
something i saw from a gift shop :
" nobody is perfect, and i am a nobody, therefore i am perfect."
its soooo logical.
just like how intellectual ppl failed their math and i failed therefore im intellectual!
wheeeeeeeeeeeeee
it feels good to be lame and happy.
i feel like myself again.
thx to those who helped me find myself!
or maybe thx to shopping.
our class back dooooor is so nice.
front door too.
but we kind rushed abit.
so looks slip-shod.
well.
maybe cos i cant paint :)
ooooopsies.
i almost died today.
so tired.
my geog book was heavy like siao.
walk around whole of ps.
my shoulders were aching.
fortunately on the bus got place to sit.
but now my neck hurts.
and after running we dint stretch -____-
i am aching.
aiyahhhhh.
i want trning!
i feel guilty for sacrificing squash
but i guess i always sacrificed everything for squash, a change will do me good.
and anyway.
its irresponsible for me to play squash for leisure and leave those ppl alone to piant their lunch away.
but im really guilty.
to myself.
my conscience rather.
if tmr i dont train too.
but if i do, i will be rushing like siao.,
besides
i need to study for......chem.
and after that going out.
still got tuition hw.
maybe i should stop giving excuses.
im just lacking the drive i need.
but maybe it is time for me to mug and not just squash.
cos i am way behind in my studies.
and if i could just understand all those lessons, i would willibgly train everyday.
look forward to saturday.
cant wait to squeal to mabel bout how cute her present is.
and i want trning!
friday got trning?
i guess so.
but after that got prize presentation i think .
-_____-
then dinner!
hopefully i get to skip tuition.
or else it will just ruin my day.
but i know it is impossible.
aiyah....
i saw lots of cute stuff i want.
but i shall resist the temptation.
i dont need them.
sometimes i think im too hard on myself.
i should just splurge on what i want.
if only.
tmr is raffles book day.
so fun lorh -___-
eeeyer.
im some stupid poker card.
alice in wonderland.
how wonderful :)
i want to live in wonderland.
wonka land would do fine too.
i was supposed to start on my art like an hour ago.
but thats how much time i have wasted.
stupid computer.
computers are bad.
i must learn some self discipline.
i like going to school now.
yay!
but probably next week i wont.
with all those tests coming.
i am going to fail chem and math
again
anyway.
today i had lunch at 5pm!
but i wasnt starving lah....
drank too much air le.
stayed back to help paintthe front door.
cos no body stayed back except for:
joce, me, alethea, casslyn, rachel.livia, jieying,madeline?,
if i left out anyone, sorry.
but they are all nice helpful ppl!
the others were all busy.
so we stayed for 3 hrs to piant and paint and paint.
was tiring and boring.
and with me and csslyn's artistic ability,
we kept ruining the thing!
haha.
but it was fun crapping and laughing.
esp with noisy casslyn who talk so much and keep painting wrongly.
i am happy today!
finally!
and i like arguing with casslyn.
it makes me happy.
cos shes the only one i can ever win.
well sort of:)
and i was vert thrilled.
the excitement of shopping made me high.
though i was rather tired.
PE ran 1.6km in 8.3 mins.
though jocelyne was kinda hyperventilating or rather breathing loudly and scarily.
so i dint dare to leave her behind.
but she still managed to run very fast.she rested like 5 secs only :)
oooh.
i bought mabel's present.
which burned a whole in my pocket :)
ms neo owes me a freaking 20 bucks!!!!!!!!
and mabel's present is cuteeeeeee
very.
i want it for myself.
but i would be guilty spurging on something for myself.
but i am jealous cos i havent bought anything for myself except food for like ages.
and suddenly buy spend on something for someone...
nevermind.
i think i have finally truely felt the joy of giving now.
yay.
as in really seriously im not lying.
i feel happy buying mabel a present.
and i hope she likes it :)
me and jocelyne also sourced for val's present.
and we thought of something super innovative.
joce rather.
i cant think of something like that....
but its gonna make her fat XD
its a sinful indulgence :)
i feeel happyy.
im broke le.
yay
still have to buy jocelyne present
eileen's really belated one.
jodee's? hers havent come yet lah.
coming then she will remind me one horh ?
haha.
something i saw from a gift shop :
" nobody is perfect, and i am a nobody, therefore i am perfect."
its soooo logical.
just like how intellectual ppl failed their math and i failed therefore im intellectual!
wheeeeeeeeeeeeee
it feels good to be lame and happy.
i feel like myself again.
thx to those who helped me find myself!
or maybe thx to shopping.
our class back dooooor is so nice.
front door too.
but we kind rushed abit.
so looks slip-shod.
well.
maybe cos i cant paint :)
ooooopsies.
i almost died today.
so tired.
my geog book was heavy like siao.
walk around whole of ps.
my shoulders were aching.
fortunately on the bus got place to sit.
but now my neck hurts.
and after running we dint stretch -____-
i am aching.
aiyahhhhh.
i want trning!
i feel guilty for sacrificing squash
but i guess i always sacrificed everything for squash, a change will do me good.
and anyway.
its irresponsible for me to play squash for leisure and leave those ppl alone to piant their lunch away.
but im really guilty.
to myself.
my conscience rather.
if tmr i dont train too.
but if i do, i will be rushing like siao.,
besides
i need to study for......chem.
and after that going out.
still got tuition hw.
maybe i should stop giving excuses.
im just lacking the drive i need.
but maybe it is time for me to mug and not just squash.
cos i am way behind in my studies.
and if i could just understand all those lessons, i would willibgly train everyday.
look forward to saturday.
cant wait to squeal to mabel bout how cute her present is.
and i want trning!
friday got trning?
i guess so.
but after that got prize presentation i think .
-_____-
then dinner!
hopefully i get to skip tuition.
or else it will just ruin my day.
but i know it is impossible.
aiyah....
i saw lots of cute stuff i want.
but i shall resist the temptation.
i dont need them.
sometimes i think im too hard on myself.
i should just splurge on what i want.
if only.
tmr is raffles book day.
so fun lorh -___-
eeeyer.
im some stupid poker card.
alice in wonderland.
how wonderful :)
i want to live in wonderland.
wonka land would do fine too.
i was supposed to start on my art like an hour ago.
but thats how much time i have wasted.
stupid computer.
computers are bad.
i must learn some self discipline.
ooooohmegoooodnessssss
ooooooooh
i like going to school now.
yay!
but probably next week i wont.
with all those tests coming.
i am going to fail chem and math
again
anyway.
today i had lunch at 5pm!
but i wasnt starving lah....
drank too much air le.
stayed back to help paintthe front door.
cos no body stayed back except for:
joce, me, alethea, casslyn, rachel.livia, jieying,madeline?,
if i left out anyone, sorry.
but they are all nice helpful ppl!
the others were all busy.
so we stayed for 3 hrs to piant and paint and paint.
was tiring and boring.
and with me and csslyn's artistic ability,
we kept ruining the thing!
haha.
but it was fun crapping and laughing.
esp with noisy casslyn who talk so much and keep painting wrongly.
i am happy today!
finally!
and i like arguing with casslyn.
it makes me happy.
cos shes the only one i can ever win.
well sort of:)
and i was vert thrilled.
the excitement of shopping made me high.
though i was rather tired.
PE ran 1.6km in 8.3 mins.
though jocelyne was kinda hyperventilating or rather breathing loudly and scarily.
so i dint dare to leave her behind.
but she still managed to run very fast.she rested like 5 secs only :)
oooh.
i bought mabel's present.
which burned a whole in my pocket :)
ms neo owes me a freaking 20 bucks!!!!!!!!
and mabel's present is cuteeeeeee
very.
i want it for myself.
but i would be guilty spurging on something for myself.
but i am jealous cos i havent bought anything for myself except food for like ages.
and suddenly buy spend on something for someone...
nevermind.
i think i have finally truely felt the joy of giving now.
yay.
as in really seriously im not lying.
i feel happy buying mabel a present.
and i hope she likes it :)
me and jocelyne also sourced for val's present.
and we thought of something super innovative.
joce rather.
i cant think of something like that....
but its gonna make her fat XD
its a sinful indulgence :)
i feeel happyy.
im broke le.
yay
still have to buy jocelyne present
eileen's really belated one.
jodee's? hers havent come yet lah.
coming then she will remind me one horh ?
haha.
something i saw from a gift shop :
" nobody is perfect, and i am a nobody, therefore i am perfect."
its soooo logical.
just like how intellectual ppl failed their math and i failed therefore im intellectual!
wheeeeeeeeeeeeee
it feels good to be lame and happy.
i feel like myself again.
thx to those who helped me find myself!
or maybe thx to shopping.
our class back dooooor is so nice.
front door too.
but we kind rushed abit.
so looks slip-shod.
well.
maybe cos i cant paint :)
ooooopsies.
i almost died today.
so tired.
my geog book was heavy like siao.
walk around whole of ps.
my shoulders were aching.
fortunately on the bus got place to sit.
but now my neck hurts.
and after running we dint stretch -____-
i am aching.
aiyahhhhh.
i want trning!
i feel guilty for sacrificing squash
but i guess i always sacrificed everything for squash, a change will do me good.
and anyway.
its irresponsible for me to play squash for leisure and leave those ppl alone to piant their lunch away.
but im really guilty.
to myself.
my conscience rather.
if tmr i dont train too.
but if i do, i will be rushing like siao.,
besides
i need to study for......chem.
and after that going out.
still got tuition hw.
maybe i should stop giving excuses.
im just lacking the drive i need.
but maybe it is time for me to mug and not just squash.
cos i am way behind in my studies.
and if i could just understand all those lessons, i would willibgly train everyday.
look forward to saturday.
cant wait to squeal to mabel bout how cute her present is.
and i want trning!
friday got trning?
i guess so.
but after that got prize presentation i think .
-_____-
then dinner!
hopefully i get to skip tuition.
or else it will just ruin my day.
but i know it is impossible.
aiyah....
i saw lots of cute stuff i want.
but i shall resist the temptation.
i dont need them.
sometimes i think im too hard on myself.
i should just splurge on what i want.
if only.
tmr is raffles book day.
so fun lorh -___-
eeeyer.
im some stupid poker card.
alice in wonderland.
how wonderful :)
i want to live in wonderland.
wonka land would do fine too.
i was supposed to start on my art like an hour ago.
but thats how much time i have wasted.
stupid computer.
computers are bad.
i must learn some self discipline.
i like going to school now.
yay!
but probably next week i wont.
with all those tests coming.
i am going to fail chem and math
again
anyway.
today i had lunch at 5pm!
but i wasnt starving lah....
drank too much air le.
stayed back to help paintthe front door.
cos no body stayed back except for:
joce, me, alethea, casslyn, rachel.livia, jieying,madeline?,
if i left out anyone, sorry.
but they are all nice helpful ppl!
the others were all busy.
so we stayed for 3 hrs to piant and paint and paint.
was tiring and boring.
and with me and csslyn's artistic ability,
we kept ruining the thing!
haha.
but it was fun crapping and laughing.
esp with noisy casslyn who talk so much and keep painting wrongly.
i am happy today!
finally!
and i like arguing with casslyn.
it makes me happy.
cos shes the only one i can ever win.
well sort of:)
and i was vert thrilled.
the excitement of shopping made me high.
though i was rather tired.
PE ran 1.6km in 8.3 mins.
though jocelyne was kinda hyperventilating or rather breathing loudly and scarily.
so i dint dare to leave her behind.
but she still managed to run very fast.she rested like 5 secs only :)
oooh.
i bought mabel's present.
which burned a whole in my pocket :)
ms neo owes me a freaking 20 bucks!!!!!!!!
and mabel's present is cuteeeeeee
very.
i want it for myself.
but i would be guilty spurging on something for myself.
but i am jealous cos i havent bought anything for myself except food for like ages.
and suddenly buy spend on something for someone...
nevermind.
i think i have finally truely felt the joy of giving now.
yay.
as in really seriously im not lying.
i feel happy buying mabel a present.
and i hope she likes it :)
me and jocelyne also sourced for val's present.
and we thought of something super innovative.
joce rather.
i cant think of something like that....
but its gonna make her fat XD
its a sinful indulgence :)
i feeel happyy.
im broke le.
yay
still have to buy jocelyne present
eileen's really belated one.
jodee's? hers havent come yet lah.
coming then she will remind me one horh ?
haha.
something i saw from a gift shop :
" nobody is perfect, and i am a nobody, therefore i am perfect."
its soooo logical.
just like how intellectual ppl failed their math and i failed therefore im intellectual!
wheeeeeeeeeeeeee
it feels good to be lame and happy.
i feel like myself again.
thx to those who helped me find myself!
or maybe thx to shopping.
our class back dooooor is so nice.
front door too.
but we kind rushed abit.
so looks slip-shod.
well.
maybe cos i cant paint :)
ooooopsies.
i almost died today.
so tired.
my geog book was heavy like siao.
walk around whole of ps.
my shoulders were aching.
fortunately on the bus got place to sit.
but now my neck hurts.
and after running we dint stretch -____-
i am aching.
aiyahhhhh.
i want trning!
i feel guilty for sacrificing squash
but i guess i always sacrificed everything for squash, a change will do me good.
and anyway.
its irresponsible for me to play squash for leisure and leave those ppl alone to piant their lunch away.
but im really guilty.
to myself.
my conscience rather.
if tmr i dont train too.
but if i do, i will be rushing like siao.,
besides
i need to study for......chem.
and after that going out.
still got tuition hw.
maybe i should stop giving excuses.
im just lacking the drive i need.
but maybe it is time for me to mug and not just squash.
cos i am way behind in my studies.
and if i could just understand all those lessons, i would willibgly train everyday.
look forward to saturday.
cant wait to squeal to mabel bout how cute her present is.
and i want trning!
friday got trning?
i guess so.
but after that got prize presentation i think .
-_____-
then dinner!
hopefully i get to skip tuition.
or else it will just ruin my day.
but i know it is impossible.
aiyah....
i saw lots of cute stuff i want.
but i shall resist the temptation.
i dont need them.
sometimes i think im too hard on myself.
i should just splurge on what i want.
if only.
tmr is raffles book day.
so fun lorh -___-
eeeyer.
im some stupid poker card.
alice in wonderland.
how wonderful :)
i want to live in wonderland.
wonka land would do fine too.
i was supposed to start on my art like an hour ago.
but thats how much time i have wasted.
stupid computer.
computers are bad.
i must learn some self discipline.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
stupid stupid stupid.
what is with the latest stupid fad at home.
or maybe its just me thats not caught up with it.
and i wont want to.
cos i despise it and find it utterly disgusting.
or maybe im just jealous.
oh well.
there is this really really obvious biasness against me.
and nope
im not being overly sensitive.
but anyway
i have much more things to do then be bothered with you fat idiot.
oh my goodness.
so cool.
it is so so so so touching! i love tv!
watching tv is good for the development of the mind :)
and and and and.
honestly,
i think i am so tactful compared to some people
and seriously if u think the truth is just hurtful, dont tell me.
just tell a white lie.
i rather not know the freaking truth.
but now that i know, i guess it just lets me know what type of person you are.
and anyway,
i gave up thinking u would change long time ago.
so this horrible discovery of the truth doesnt really impact me much.
and i have learnt to acccept the fact that i cant change your character.
and if u want to remain the way u are.
i can do nothing about it.
perhaps im the only one that doesnt like the way u are now,
but if it makes you a happier person,
good for you.
all i can do is wish u luck.
too bad for me i guess.
anyway,
i have grown to realise not everyone wants to be a good person.
and i know that things cant be the way i want it to be.
and whatever which seemed to be true is never true.
i am just not someone with good judgement i guess.
perhaps.
right now
you are thinking the same things as me.
sorry if i angered you in anyway.
u either tell me frankly what i should change.
or just act superficial/tactful and pretend that u like me.
but i guess i cant possibly live on decieving myself with all these untruths.
what i want to say is:
if u dont like me, say it. or just act like u do like me.and do a good job of acting.
i really hate seeing that look in your eyes which totally betrays your words.
i know im not as likable as i want to be.
i have been living in lies of my own,
decieving myself.
like lying to myself that i can do it.
lying that you dont hate me.
lying that i believe in goodness.
GROW UP.
yes thats what i need to do.
i need to accept the truth and not just manipulate them to become what i want them to be.
maybe thats why u are so pissed with me.
cos i refuse to accept the truth and continue living in my fairy tale story.
hmph.
and then lets talk about ___.
i cant believe i got pissed with you.
perhaps i just cant understand why u did that.
but i think u ought to have done that.
it certaintly woke me up.
and im really sorry for doing those things i did.
or maybe those things i never did but ought to have done.
sheeesh.
rs is super dead.
and anna is funny.
unique sense of humour.
which just proves strangers can be group members:)
and most importantly proves that im not anti-social:)
or maybe its just another one of the lies i live in.
pffffft.
oh well.
math retest was okay.
much easier but i dunno how to do some.
after that stayed back with joce to do the front door deco.
since no one seems to realise that the dead line is like thursday?
and we havet even discussed who wear what
still got back door.
and have to paint lorh
so tmr i will be staying back to volunteer to paint with joce:)
fine
maybe its not volunteer.
its my responsibility since im part of the class.
i cant believe im such a hypocrite.
and i am just as selfish so i have no right to say about others.
haha.
201 is the slowest class lah.
in deco.
subject topics (blame it on the teachers)
cle proposal.
waahaha.
its people like me who contribute to it ;D
oooops:)
IPU im gonna DIE.
sit and reach also.
honestly, i think that ___whom i barely know is anytime better than you.
but what can i do about it.
at least she has better moral values than you.
and you just dont want to change.
oh man.
i might just be distorting facts.
maybe its not moral values.
maybe theres nothing wrong wth you.
its just ME.
grrrrrrrrrrrrr.
OH MY GOSH!
quadraplets are so cool and cute!!!!!!
squash is not as nice as before:(
i love jocelyne and anthea!
oooh.
i saw anthea.
she blush like siao.
and kept hiding her face!
i know who tianyi is le.
yay!
jocelyne makes me guilty cos shes nice and im not :(
i love geog!
you make me sick
what is with the latest stupid fad at home.
or maybe its just me thats not caught up with it.
and i wont want to.
cos i despise it and find it utterly disgusting.
or maybe im just jealous.
oh well.
there is this really really obvious biasness against me.
and nope
im not being overly sensitive.
but anyway
i have much more things to do then be bothered with you fat idiot.
oh my goodness.
so cool.
it is so so so so touching! i love tv!
watching tv is good for the development of the mind :)
and and and and.
honestly,
i think i am so tactful compared to some people
and seriously if u think the truth is just hurtful, dont tell me.
just tell a white lie.
i rather not know the freaking truth.
but now that i know, i guess it just lets me know what type of person you are.
and anyway,
i gave up thinking u would change long time ago.
so this horrible discovery of the truth doesnt really impact me much.
and i have learnt to acccept the fact that i cant change your character.
and if u want to remain the way u are.
i can do nothing about it.
perhaps im the only one that doesnt like the way u are now,
but if it makes you a happier person,
good for you.
all i can do is wish u luck.
too bad for me i guess.
anyway,
i have grown to realise not everyone wants to be a good person.
and i know that things cant be the way i want it to be.
and whatever which seemed to be true is never true.
i am just not someone with good judgement i guess.
perhaps.
right now
you are thinking the same things as me.
sorry if i angered you in anyway.
u either tell me frankly what i should change.
or just act superficial/tactful and pretend that u like me.
but i guess i cant possibly live on decieving myself with all these untruths.
what i want to say is:
if u dont like me, say it. or just act like u do like me.and do a good job of acting.
i really hate seeing that look in your eyes which totally betrays your words.
i know im not as likable as i want to be.
i have been living in lies of my own,
decieving myself.
like lying to myself that i can do it.
lying that you dont hate me.
lying that i believe in goodness.
GROW UP.
yes thats what i need to do.
i need to accept the truth and not just manipulate them to become what i want them to be.
maybe thats why u are so pissed with me.
cos i refuse to accept the truth and continue living in my fairy tale story.
hmph.
and then lets talk about ___.
i cant believe i got pissed with you.
perhaps i just cant understand why u did that.
but i think u ought to have done that.
it certaintly woke me up.
and im really sorry for doing those things i did.
or maybe those things i never did but ought to have done.
sheeesh.
rs is super dead.
and anna is funny.
unique sense of humour.
which just proves strangers can be group members:)
and most importantly proves that im not anti-social:)
or maybe its just another one of the lies i live in.
pffffft.
oh well.
math retest was okay.
much easier but i dunno how to do some.
after that stayed back with joce to do the front door deco.
since no one seems to realise that the dead line is like thursday?
and we havet even discussed who wear what
still got back door.
and have to paint lorh
so tmr i will be staying back to volunteer to paint with joce:)
fine
maybe its not volunteer.
its my responsibility since im part of the class.
i cant believe im such a hypocrite.
and i am just as selfish so i have no right to say about others.
haha.
201 is the slowest class lah.
in deco.
subject topics (blame it on the teachers)
cle proposal.
waahaha.
its people like me who contribute to it ;D
oooops:)
IPU im gonna DIE.
sit and reach also.
honestly, i think that ___whom i barely know is anytime better than you.
but what can i do about it.
at least she has better moral values than you.
and you just dont want to change.
oh man.
i might just be distorting facts.
maybe its not moral values.
maybe theres nothing wrong wth you.
its just ME.
grrrrrrrrrrrrr.
OH MY GOSH!
quadraplets are so cool and cute!!!!!!
squash is not as nice as before:(
i love jocelyne and anthea!
oooh.
i saw anthea.
she blush like siao.
and kept hiding her face!
i know who tianyi is le.
yay!
jocelyne makes me guilty cos shes nice and im not :(
i love geog!
you make me sick
Sunday, April 16, 2006
i love eating doughnuts!
and i am back from having dim sum in hong kong :)
wheeeeeeee.
my ambition is to be a food connoisseur who globetrots around the world eating!
any potential sponsors please contact me :)
doughnuts are really really yummy.
i have barely made any improvements on my nphilo journal.
but i dunno what to write so i am just writing irrelevant stuff.
im gonna flunk it.
oooooh
if i stay back one year then it will be so coool.
hah.
i realised i left my math worksheets in school so i am dead.
aiyah.
anyway retest also fail.no point studying ehh.
i think my philo can do well lorh.
just that i am in no mood to think.
and i am brain dead.
and i have had a brain block for weeks :)
so in conclusion i will not do well for this year philo.
but i have the potential to be a GREAT philosopher :)
hopefully by next year philo module my brain block will be gone ?
wheee.
im ego.
i love fruitips.
i neeeeeeeed chocalate!
oh oh oh.
i thought of something intellectual!!!
it kind of sums up what i feel:)
all those rantings are going into one sweet line!
everyone is so caught up with his/her self that he/she cannot be bothered with others. all they think of is themselves, and they never spare a thought for others, enclosing themselves in their circle, keeping to themselves and depriving themselves of a social life.
like like like like....
er.
how people stuff their ears silly with mp3s...and then its like this kind of gadgets stop people from socialising, and interacting with people, talking to each other, so basically, all they do is think about themselves.
so here comes the communication breakdowns.
the tiffs.
the misunderstandings
the backstabbings
the bitchings
i think i am just one of the selfish people. but minus the mp3 stuffed in me.
yes.
and perhaps i have no right to accuse others of it too.
and perhaps i am just making a generalisation.
hmmmm.
oooh.
that wasnt exactly one line ;D
and i am not talking about anyone in particular, just like what i observe from the implications of technology.
huh?
oh noooo.
i dont exactly know if i am talking bout selfishness or technolgy.
hah.
i am not in a clear state of mind.
told you i have a brain block :)
oh well.
i am not talking bout people with mp3s.
just could only think of that example cos
i have a brain block.
today was not eventful.
as usual.
the homework seems alot.
but suddenly all semm to have disappeared.
maybe cos the deadlines arnt nearing :)
i wish there was some software i coul install in my head to make me think systhematically.
like computers are systhematic cos there is java script to command it....isit?
and i need to be organised.
well.
i think i mean i need to focus.
i cant even focus on my own thoughts.
so you see i am always incoherent in speech and actions and thoughts:)
my brain is going hay-wire.
i am selfish and inconsiderate and petty by saying you are.
oh nooooooooooooooooo.
and i am back from having dim sum in hong kong :)
wheeeeeeee.
my ambition is to be a food connoisseur who globetrots around the world eating!
any potential sponsors please contact me :)
doughnuts are really really yummy.
i have barely made any improvements on my nphilo journal.
but i dunno what to write so i am just writing irrelevant stuff.
im gonna flunk it.
oooooh
if i stay back one year then it will be so coool.
hah.
i realised i left my math worksheets in school so i am dead.
aiyah.
anyway retest also fail.no point studying ehh.
i think my philo can do well lorh.
just that i am in no mood to think.
and i am brain dead.
and i have had a brain block for weeks :)
so in conclusion i will not do well for this year philo.
but i have the potential to be a GREAT philosopher :)
hopefully by next year philo module my brain block will be gone ?
wheee.
im ego.
i love fruitips.
i neeeeeeeed chocalate!
oh oh oh.
i thought of something intellectual!!!
it kind of sums up what i feel:)
all those rantings are going into one sweet line!
everyone is so caught up with his/her self that he/she cannot be bothered with others. all they think of is themselves, and they never spare a thought for others, enclosing themselves in their circle, keeping to themselves and depriving themselves of a social life.
like like like like....
er.
how people stuff their ears silly with mp3s...and then its like this kind of gadgets stop people from socialising, and interacting with people, talking to each other, so basically, all they do is think about themselves.
so here comes the communication breakdowns.
the tiffs.
the misunderstandings
the backstabbings
the bitchings
i think i am just one of the selfish people. but minus the mp3 stuffed in me.
yes.
and perhaps i have no right to accuse others of it too.
and perhaps i am just making a generalisation.
hmmmm.
oooh.
that wasnt exactly one line ;D
and i am not talking about anyone in particular, just like what i observe from the implications of technology.
huh?
oh noooo.
i dont exactly know if i am talking bout selfishness or technolgy.
hah.
i am not in a clear state of mind.
told you i have a brain block :)
oh well.
i am not talking bout people with mp3s.
just could only think of that example cos
i have a brain block.
today was not eventful.
as usual.
the homework seems alot.
but suddenly all semm to have disappeared.
maybe cos the deadlines arnt nearing :)
i wish there was some software i coul install in my head to make me think systhematically.
like computers are systhematic cos there is java script to command it....isit?
and i need to be organised.
well.
i think i mean i need to focus.
i cant even focus on my own thoughts.
so you see i am always incoherent in speech and actions and thoughts:)
my brain is going hay-wire.
i am selfish and inconsiderate and petty by saying you are.
oh nooooooooooooooooo.
chewonit.net provides comic relief indeed
makes me laugh real hard.
its so witty!!!
oooooooh.
i MUST read more of it.
so i will be a happier person.
and so i will laugh and smile more.
YES.
but those flash movies are still funnier.
but this comics are more relevant to my life i guess.
and more civilized :D
i like laughing :)
hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha
-____- whatever.
makes me laugh real hard.
its so witty!!!
oooooooh.
i MUST read more of it.
so i will be a happier person.
and so i will laugh and smile more.
YES.
but those flash movies are still funnier.
but this comics are more relevant to my life i guess.
and more civilized :D
i like laughing :)
hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha
-____- whatever.
Saturday, April 15, 2006
stupidity
i dont like stupid people.
and im not being arrogant.
oh
maybe i am.
well but i think im stupid.
at least some things i do are.
and some people are REALLY dumb.
like you- know- who!
and my sister. well most of the time.
eeeeeyer.
jodee!
"yay jodee improved alot(squash). no-yay jodee is spastic"
heh.
cant believe im learning jodee's spastic talk.
well.
maybe its just creativity which i do not appreciate.
but jodee admits its spastic :)
and jodee!
if 8 out of ten people are bad,
i dont think i can qualify to be one of the two.
or maybe ur standard too high.
aiyah.
got eileen's friends like powerpuff girls (reminds me of cream puff!) and justice league and teen titans,
the world is a much better place lorh!
XD
and besides eileen ah beng ah seng ah meng and what-knots,
plus ur xiao hei xiao bai xiao hong xiao lu xiao lan xiao huang and what-knots,
thats why 8 out of ten people are bad!
waaahaha.
so u must disband ur lian gang with weird weird names :)
so that the world will be a better place!
oh crap.
im crapping.
i dont think im making sense so just ignore that.
the feeeeeeeeeeee-ling is BACK!
oooooh yeah.
i feel the passion (which died for 2 weeks) for squash again!
after today's trning!
i feel HAPPY :)
but math retest and philo SA journal on tuesday.
i am DEAD MEAT i tell you.
today im gonna slack.
cos saturdays are SQUASH DAYS = BE HAPPY DAYS!
whee.
SUNDAY = CHIONG HOMEWORK DAYS
hah.
i think i will flunk math retest.
grrrr.
i honestly give up hope.
and im not very bothered about it.
afterall i fail so many times, one more time wont matter.
but i guess i shld make good use of the opportunity given.
but i wont
my thinking is warped.
aiyah.
somehow i think retest i will do worse then the original XD
eeeeyer.
i need some motivation in life!
my thinking is honestly not as warped as some people.
its seems unbelievable there are such evil/weird people in the world.
villians indeed.
but nevermind,
there will always be a superhero (like justice league!) who will save the day!
yay.
hmmmm.
but i guess in reality its not very possible.
so i shall just hope i dont meet such evil people in the future.
otherwise i DIE.
so scary and freaky and unbelievable.
but i believe evil people are not downright evil.
they are actually nice people.
maybe last time or maybe they will be nice.
sooner or later they will be nice.
but i think that person was nice and will now never be nice.
I know that YOU know that person I am talking about :)
i hope to smile more cos i dont want wrinkles:)
im frowning alot.
yuck.
and tuition last night was......weird?
but well, it was hilarious what sicko words valerie soh came up with :)
how? how?
me and joce cant go same days.
eeeeeeeyer.
maybe i shall change my tuition to someday instead of friday.
but i handed up my form le.
DIE.
but i can always change it:)
nga man goes jiang on saturday!
but i doubt i can join her class...
cos saturdays are SQUASH DAYS!
yay.
i shall look for another alternative.
im scared you died and i dint know about it cos u dint tell me.
eeek.
ohhhh noooooo.
i hope u dint die otherwise i will feel guilty for being mean!
thats why
i shall learn to be nice and tactful to everybody!
in case im mean and someone dies and then i will feel guilty!
so hint hint : be nice to me otherwise when i suddenly die u will be guilty XD
waahaha.
im digressing.
aiyah........
i shall feign ignorance of being ignored.
that sounds uber cool right! its alliteration or something?
i hope u are alive. ><
i wonder.
may all be well and happy!
including me.
i will try my best to be as perfect as i can be.
lunch was a horrible BK meal at about 2.30pm even though i was starving
but with mabel along it wasnt that bad.
imaginge if i went to little india :)
i would be irritated at having to go home from there, and walking thru ulu boon keng mrt underpass.
yay.
but i was stupid.
AGAIN
wanted to dash across road from ngee ann city to lucky plaza bus stop.
but alot of cars.
so i waited...
and i saw my bus!
so i wanted to dash across but dint dare cos i dint want to risk it.
the cars were starting to come nearer you see.
and so i hoped and hoped the bus would like stop there or something.
and it did.
but i still couldnt cross.
and it left.
so i decided that i shall walk to traffic light to cross.
and walk slowly since i would have to wait at eeeeky bus stop for super long.
so i strolled.
and i realised the traffic light was uber far from busstop.
so i decided to go to next bus stop at heeren since it was nearer.
and i could while the time away.
then i realised there dont have my bus.
so i walked to next stop at somerset.
then my bus came like 5mins later!
yay.
so fast!
maybe cos i strolled such a long distance....
from borders to somerset?
woah.
dumb dumb dumb.
aiyah.
at least i dont have to stand at bus stop to wait so long.
with ppl giving me weird stares at me.
i always see ppl with that look on the face.
the look which says like " is that a tennis racquet?"
grrrrrrrrrrrr.
forgoodnesssake!
its squash!
like how those jc girls dumbly asked eileen and jodee if it was special.
hahaha
this mrning in the bus there was this man looking at me weirdly.
did i step on his feet or something?
but anyway he was irritating so i glared at him.
but he kept looking up from time to time.
so i glared at him like chucky:)
waahaha.
i am in deeeeeeeep shit.
whee.
and im not being arrogant.
oh
maybe i am.
well but i think im stupid.
at least some things i do are.
and some people are REALLY dumb.
like you- know- who!
and my sister. well most of the time.
eeeeeyer.
jodee!
"yay jodee improved alot(squash). no-yay jodee is spastic"
heh.
cant believe im learning jodee's spastic talk.
well.
maybe its just creativity which i do not appreciate.
but jodee admits its spastic :)
and jodee!
if 8 out of ten people are bad,
i dont think i can qualify to be one of the two.
or maybe ur standard too high.
aiyah.
got eileen's friends like powerpuff girls (reminds me of cream puff!) and justice league and teen titans,
the world is a much better place lorh!
XD
and besides eileen ah beng ah seng ah meng and what-knots,
plus ur xiao hei xiao bai xiao hong xiao lu xiao lan xiao huang and what-knots,
thats why 8 out of ten people are bad!
waaahaha.
so u must disband ur lian gang with weird weird names :)
so that the world will be a better place!
oh crap.
im crapping.
i dont think im making sense so just ignore that.
the feeeeeeeeeeee-ling is BACK!
oooooh yeah.
i feel the passion (which died for 2 weeks) for squash again!
after today's trning!
i feel HAPPY :)
but math retest and philo SA journal on tuesday.
i am DEAD MEAT i tell you.
today im gonna slack.
cos saturdays are SQUASH DAYS = BE HAPPY DAYS!
whee.
SUNDAY = CHIONG HOMEWORK DAYS
hah.
i think i will flunk math retest.
grrrr.
i honestly give up hope.
and im not very bothered about it.
afterall i fail so many times, one more time wont matter.
but i guess i shld make good use of the opportunity given.
but i wont
my thinking is warped.
aiyah.
somehow i think retest i will do worse then the original XD
eeeeyer.
i need some motivation in life!
my thinking is honestly not as warped as some people.
its seems unbelievable there are such evil/weird people in the world.
villians indeed.
but nevermind,
there will always be a superhero (like justice league!) who will save the day!
yay.
hmmmm.
but i guess in reality its not very possible.
so i shall just hope i dont meet such evil people in the future.
otherwise i DIE.
so scary and freaky and unbelievable.
but i believe evil people are not downright evil.
they are actually nice people.
maybe last time or maybe they will be nice.
sooner or later they will be nice.
but i think that person was nice and will now never be nice.
I know that YOU know that person I am talking about :)
i hope to smile more cos i dont want wrinkles:)
im frowning alot.
yuck.
and tuition last night was......weird?
but well, it was hilarious what sicko words valerie soh came up with :)
how? how?
me and joce cant go same days.
eeeeeeeyer.
maybe i shall change my tuition to someday instead of friday.
but i handed up my form le.
DIE.
but i can always change it:)
nga man goes jiang on saturday!
but i doubt i can join her class...
cos saturdays are SQUASH DAYS!
yay.
i shall look for another alternative.
im scared you died and i dint know about it cos u dint tell me.
eeek.
ohhhh noooooo.
i hope u dint die otherwise i will feel guilty for being mean!
thats why
i shall learn to be nice and tactful to everybody!
in case im mean and someone dies and then i will feel guilty!
so hint hint : be nice to me otherwise when i suddenly die u will be guilty XD
waahaha.
im digressing.
aiyah........
i shall feign ignorance of being ignored.
that sounds uber cool right! its alliteration or something?
i hope u are alive. ><
i wonder.
may all be well and happy!
including me.
i will try my best to be as perfect as i can be.
lunch was a horrible BK meal at about 2.30pm even though i was starving
but with mabel along it wasnt that bad.
imaginge if i went to little india :)
i would be irritated at having to go home from there, and walking thru ulu boon keng mrt underpass.
yay.
but i was stupid.
AGAIN
wanted to dash across road from ngee ann city to lucky plaza bus stop.
but alot of cars.
so i waited...
and i saw my bus!
so i wanted to dash across but dint dare cos i dint want to risk it.
the cars were starting to come nearer you see.
and so i hoped and hoped the bus would like stop there or something.
and it did.
but i still couldnt cross.
and it left.
so i decided that i shall walk to traffic light to cross.
and walk slowly since i would have to wait at eeeeky bus stop for super long.
so i strolled.
and i realised the traffic light was uber far from busstop.
so i decided to go to next bus stop at heeren since it was nearer.
and i could while the time away.
then i realised there dont have my bus.
so i walked to next stop at somerset.
then my bus came like 5mins later!
yay.
so fast!
maybe cos i strolled such a long distance....
from borders to somerset?
woah.
dumb dumb dumb.
aiyah.
at least i dont have to stand at bus stop to wait so long.
with ppl giving me weird stares at me.
i always see ppl with that look on the face.
the look which says like " is that a tennis racquet?"
grrrrrrrrrrrr.
forgoodnesssake!
its squash!
like how those jc girls dumbly asked eileen and jodee if it was special.
hahaha
this mrning in the bus there was this man looking at me weirdly.
did i step on his feet or something?
but anyway he was irritating so i glared at him.
but he kept looking up from time to time.
so i glared at him like chucky:)
waahaha.
i am in deeeeeeeep shit.
whee.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
im uber dead.
dunno how to do philo.
and im in for dc.
cos im plain stupid.
smart aleck.
pffffffft.
i love mabel!
i love juniors!
recently,
i have the tendency to be vulgar.
my vocab list has expanded.
unfortunately.
and its not that i dint know these words,
just dint use them.
im losing my self control and discipline!
ahhhh.
im starting to call ppl bitches.
maybe i just realised there were bitches and i finally could apply the word?
and i guiltily admit to mouthing f words during nationals and at home or whatever.
i dint say it out but was just reading it in my heart.
eeeeeeeeeeew.
im so guilty.
but i dont know how to control myself anymore.
aiyah.
but really got alot of bitches in my life now.
and im bitching alot.
im guilty.
stupider than ever.
more attitude probelm than ever.
eeeek.
i loook forward to trning!
acting bimbo makes me less moody.
esp with cat and anthea and zann.
but zann cant seem to master the art of it.
aiyah.
so sad worhxxx.
haha.
so cooooooool.
i have discovered alot of things i never knew,
secrets,
good
and bad
sometimes being inqusitive is no good.
im down on my luck.
blegh.
just when i needed it most.
im in for dc unless records are cleared yearly.
hoping real hard.
though i somehow feel relaxed after confirming im in dc.
cos i know sure will go, but everytime 2 bookings walk around very scary.
now dont need to be so uptight cos im in for dc.
all i wish for is someone to go with me.
i love talking to mabel.
cos we have same views.
and same problems.
kind of.
oh well.
i just can relate to her more than i can too other ppl.
and im happy to know shes there for me to talk too.
helps me destress:)
i hope im right this time cos i dont think i can deal with another disappointment.
but i trust you :)
even if i hate rgs,
im glad it gave me sooo nice friends i could never wish for,
and for giving me something to love and believe in.
but still,
i hate rgs.
school is meant to be boring.
and u arnt as innocent as i thought.
what another disappointment.
EDIT: this YOU above.as in the un-innocent person does not refer to mabel.
night makes me feel vulnerable ><
i look forward to saturday.
HAPPY EASTER DAY TMR!!!!!!
GOOD FRIDAY
NO SCH!
EDIT: thx to mabel, i got enlightened that good friday is on friday!
and easter is on SUNDAY!
something to do with the resurrection of Jesus 3 days after his death.
(i hope i remembered it correctly.or else dont take offence:) )
thats grrreat for slacking !
i hate being unlucky.
dunno how to do philo.
and im in for dc.
cos im plain stupid.
smart aleck.
pffffffft.
i love mabel!
i love juniors!
recently,
i have the tendency to be vulgar.
my vocab list has expanded.
unfortunately.
and its not that i dint know these words,
just dint use them.
im losing my self control and discipline!
ahhhh.
im starting to call ppl bitches.
maybe i just realised there were bitches and i finally could apply the word?
and i guiltily admit to mouthing f words during nationals and at home or whatever.
i dint say it out but was just reading it in my heart.
eeeeeeeeeeew.
im so guilty.
but i dont know how to control myself anymore.
aiyah.
but really got alot of bitches in my life now.
and im bitching alot.
im guilty.
stupider than ever.
more attitude probelm than ever.
eeeek.
i loook forward to trning!
acting bimbo makes me less moody.
esp with cat and anthea and zann.
but zann cant seem to master the art of it.
aiyah.
so sad worhxxx.
haha.
so cooooooool.
i have discovered alot of things i never knew,
secrets,
good
and bad
sometimes being inqusitive is no good.
im down on my luck.
blegh.
just when i needed it most.
im in for dc unless records are cleared yearly.
hoping real hard.
though i somehow feel relaxed after confirming im in dc.
cos i know sure will go, but everytime 2 bookings walk around very scary.
now dont need to be so uptight cos im in for dc.
all i wish for is someone to go with me.
i love talking to mabel.
cos we have same views.
and same problems.
kind of.
oh well.
i just can relate to her more than i can too other ppl.
and im happy to know shes there for me to talk too.
helps me destress:)
i hope im right this time cos i dont think i can deal with another disappointment.
but i trust you :)
even if i hate rgs,
im glad it gave me sooo nice friends i could never wish for,
and for giving me something to love and believe in.
but still,
i hate rgs.
school is meant to be boring.
and u arnt as innocent as i thought.
what another disappointment.
EDIT: this YOU above.as in the un-innocent person does not refer to mabel.
night makes me feel vulnerable ><
i look forward to saturday.
HAPPY EASTER DAY TMR!!!!!!
GOOD FRIDAY
NO SCH!
EDIT: thx to mabel, i got enlightened that good friday is on friday!
and easter is on SUNDAY!
something to do with the resurrection of Jesus 3 days after his death.
(i hope i remembered it correctly.or else dont take offence:) )
thats grrreat for slacking !
i hate being unlucky.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
i cant speakkkkkkkk.
im sssssqueakkkkkking.
waaahahahahaha.
lost my voice le.
now in com studs and im dying of thirst.
later going to train till 2.30?
than im going home to eat lunch!
finally i get to eat at home.
enough of outside food.
besides, im broke....
yesterday was very very very pissed when i came into school.
and whole day i was moody.
cos i got booked.
and im gonna go dc soon.
and im so dead.
cos nobody going with me
and and and and i was falling asleep half the tim in class.
and and and i kept seeing irritating ppl who irritated me further.
blegh.
i think i saaid to much to ____ the other day.
stupid lah.
always like that .....
and and and and i think i AM really dumb.
which is mainly whats iritating me.
yes.
im pissed at how stupid ppl are.
including myself.
and i realised that alot of strangers seem to have more in common with me than those who arnt strangers.
yep.
there's more than sweet, sour, bitter, salty.
i just realised there was failure and disappointment.
how disappointing. ><
eeeeeeeyer.
so disappointed in those ppl whom i admired.
i wished ppl kept their bad sides to themselves.
er.....
but i suppose that would be hypocritical and superficial....
i shall try to remember jodee's DAD's WONDERFUL HELPFUL phrase :)
but i think im too bad tempered to be able to apply it.
i shall coop myself up and cut down on social activities as jodee advises :)
i NEEEEEEEEEEEEED WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i shall cut my hair later.
but its stressful.
oh well.
i hate school.
and ________.
eeeeeeeeyer.
cant believe that he actually did THAT.
so bad.
i never knew ppl can go to such lengths to spite others.
i though it just happened in movies.
and movies are becoming real.
and reality is turning into a movie.
oh craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap.
i love my mortal.
and i think the only thing that makes me happy now is her delightful cute funny crappy letters.
i dont think i can rmb the last time i was really happy.
aaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
im sssssqueakkkkkking.
waaahahahahaha.
lost my voice le.
now in com studs and im dying of thirst.
later going to train till 2.30?
than im going home to eat lunch!
finally i get to eat at home.
enough of outside food.
besides, im broke....
yesterday was very very very pissed when i came into school.
and whole day i was moody.
cos i got booked.
and im gonna go dc soon.
and im so dead.
cos nobody going with me
and and and and i was falling asleep half the tim in class.
and and and i kept seeing irritating ppl who irritated me further.
blegh.
i think i saaid to much to ____ the other day.
stupid lah.
always like that .....
and and and and i think i AM really dumb.
which is mainly whats iritating me.
yes.
im pissed at how stupid ppl are.
including myself.
and i realised that alot of strangers seem to have more in common with me than those who arnt strangers.
yep.
there's more than sweet, sour, bitter, salty.
i just realised there was failure and disappointment.
how disappointing. ><
eeeeeeeyer.
so disappointed in those ppl whom i admired.
i wished ppl kept their bad sides to themselves.
er.....
but i suppose that would be hypocritical and superficial....
i shall try to remember jodee's DAD's WONDERFUL HELPFUL phrase :)
but i think im too bad tempered to be able to apply it.
i shall coop myself up and cut down on social activities as jodee advises :)
i NEEEEEEEEEEEEED WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i shall cut my hair later.
but its stressful.
oh well.
i hate school.
and ________.
eeeeeeeeyer.
cant believe that he actually did THAT.
so bad.
i never knew ppl can go to such lengths to spite others.
i though it just happened in movies.
and movies are becoming real.
and reality is turning into a movie.
oh craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap.
i love my mortal.
and i think the only thing that makes me happy now is her delightful cute funny crappy letters.
i dont think i can rmb the last time i was really happy.
aaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
Saturday, April 08, 2006
"
-lame joke alert-
Cat started this series of super lame jokes like:
Let me tell you a dirty joke. I fell into a drain.
I can't remember the other one. But anyway I came up with mine:
Let me tell you a stupid joke. I met you!
-end of lame joke alert-
"
this is cat's joke which i read of from mabel's blog.
and it certaintly did make me happy.
hahaha.
i love hpt, bimbo cat!
sometimes shes so lame she makes me laugh :)
i think its lamely funny.
like ice age 2.
and i love it !!!!!!
wheeeeeeeeeeee.
this made me happy.
well,
it just kind of made me un-pissed for a minute.
hmmmm.
im very jealous i dint get to go trning.
and when im jealous i am pissed.
and when i am pissed.
i am irritable.
so i suggest u get out of my way.
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
i dont care im gonna POUT all i want.
and im going to whine and whine and whine.
im freaking irritated.
and u can tell it when i start using "freaking"
i just lost my mood to blog.
HMPH HMPH HMPH HMPH MHPH
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyer.
im very agitated.
okay.
forget it.
today i wasted my life rotting away on a plastic chair in an ulu gombak stadium
during a ulu sports meet or whatever.
yes.
u heard GOMBAK
i even passed by toh tuck road.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im pissed.
and i kept whining to the person beside me that i wanted to go trning :)
haha
oh well.
anyway.
we went there not knowing what we were supposed to do.
no one told us.
so we hanged around.
until this ppl realised we were there to help.
and got us to do manual labour.
yes.
child abuse!!!!
haha.
oh well.
just me erika emelyn and lynnette
we had to carry heavy table tops and metal base of the table.
and then me and erika got redundant and unimportant jobs cos there wasnt much to do.
half the class got nothing to do.
we fo lucky got chosen to help out.
otherwise even more bored.
anyway,
erika and me got best jobs :)
haha.
the man see emelyn and lynnette skinny and long legs.
ask them be runners,
though i was insulted by his unknowing implication of saying WE had short fat legs....
oh well.
they had to run across the track after every heat.
which was aboit every 2mins or so.
haha.
just to pass one piece of paper to someone across the track.
impt job lorh.
haha.
me and eriks sat with impt ppl.
the time keepers :)
we sat there shake leg at finish line.
watch other friends run to and fro in the sun and rain.
we under shelter.
and got chair.
our dear frens stand for 7hrs
we sat so long our butt ache.
hahaha.
and we were the only ones offered food and drinks :)
but we kindly asked our frens to help themselves.
omg.what am i crapping.hahaha.im just being ego so i altered the facts XD
the nice time keeper asked them to eat lah.
ok ok.
anyway.
ilove coffee.
thx to erika :)
i drank one cup of tea,
2 half cups of coffee ultr sweet :)
one cup of orange punch
and zero amt of water.
so my throat hurts like siao now XD
i added alot of suger and milk powder in my coffee.
tonight i sure cant sleep
so im gonna stay up tonight:)
im addicted to coffee!
im gonna be diabetic at the rate i add sugar in.
and erika says if i drink 100 cups of coffee in 1hr, i will die.
ahhhh!
and erika is cool and nice whichj i found out today
im so glad i was with her.
otherwise i would have done something tiring and boring and less relaxing
hahaha.
that ____ totally irked me off.
and nga man told me "coffee mix"
is actually milk.
i so loser lah.
she was like : this is tea and coffee mix.
i was like:
ewwwwwww.tea and coffee mix tgth will die one leh
loser lah.
then she was like coffee mix is the milk u put in coffee.
-_-
ok.
i know im so loser-fied.
anway me and erika sat sheltered and comfortably shaking legs under the tent.
seeing who come in last.
then just tell the person.
haha.so cool right.
rgs only got 4 girls running.
lousy lah
anyway.
me and eriks took mrt home tgth.
and we were gossiping !!!!
wheeeeeeeee.
oh and the CIP was quite fun cos we were puking at those guys in tights.
and listening to the time keepers story about love.
hahaha.
who cares bout him lah
he keep wanting to say how he met his wife
and its by a plum seed.
yes
hahaha.lame right.
and then another guy was saying bout single is good.
then the old man say.
aiyah, dont say this in front of them, otherwise they dont want to get married.
ahhaa
they started getting pro-natalist after that.
heehee.
was amusing lah
oooh.
and talking to anthea makes me remember my sec one days.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
oh and tianyi say she going to reply your letter
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
she likes you you know!!!
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
hahaha.u all so obvious is making fun of her lorh
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
and i know im likable but she dont need to like me so much rite.....
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
aiyoh.its cos im a senior lah.last time i sec one, i also like that lorh.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
no really!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
she everyday ask me hows lifang
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
and then today she ask me if you going to ora. then i say i dont know
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
then she like so disappointed.
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
omg
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
she crush me ah? XD
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
but she is just super happy lah
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
ok ok.
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
i shall get ppl to writwe to her
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
she will be happier
oooohmegosh.
tianyi is my junior, my mortal's friend and yu hui's mortal!
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
oooooh me gosh
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
tian yi IS her mortal!!!!!!!!!!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
is it tianyi!!1
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
tianyi is so happy!!1
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
but tianyi never give yu hui flowers before!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
then today at ora tianyi met yu hui then later yu hui blush!!!!!! i saw her face went red like WHOOSH!
hahaha.tianyi is as cute as her angel!
both blush like siao one!
yuhui says:
you should have seen tianyi's expression when she saw me during ora
yuhui says:
she was talking and laughinjg with ehr friends
yuhui says:
then when she saw me
yuhui says:
her face was...
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
my mortal just told me that
yuhui says:
i dunno.
yuhui says:
ohh
yuhui says:
hahahhaha
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
she said ur face was red like whoooosh
yuhui says:
really?
yuhui says:
haha
yuhui says:
i didnt realise
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
hahaha.u always blush
yuhui says:
cos it was damn funyn lah tianyi's face
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
hahaha.i bet she found u funny too
yuhui says:
i think cos i was laughing silently at her face
yuhui says:
cos like
yuhui says:
damn funny lah
yuhui says:
hedh
yuhui says:
heh*
yuhui says:
she was like scared/ shocked dunno what
yuhui says:
then i was like
yuhui says:
"lifts up eyebrow"
haha.
yu hui though is tianyi blush then she try not to laugh
but i guess they ended up blushing at each other!!!
oh well.
i love anthea!!!!!!!!
wheeeeee.
and i miss squash.
eeeeyer.
my life feels empty without it
i ate dinner at like 8pm today.
hah.
so random
talking bout tianyi,
she reminds me of how last year we sec ones were like crazy when __________.
right my dear squashers?
ahaha.
mybe its just jodee and me lah.
and mable wasn tlike that last year.
only this year lorh
right mabel :)
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
first lesson. she ask why japan so packed. i said super softly, maybe because of the sumo wrestlers. dont know how she hear she come to me and ask what my name was. 2nd lesson know my name already.
omg.
i know this is mean.
but my mortal is so cute :)
but thats why she so racist and tactless thats why her teacher pissed with her.
hmmmmm.
i think im so philosophical when i told her to respect other ppl's culture :)
heehee.
im a good role model! a wonderful senior!!!
wheeeee.
but i think that wud be something i wud say last time.
but i realised i have really matured in my thinking alot.
i think its what squash has done for me.
even if the outcome of trnings wernt very desirable.
the process made me a better, stronger, more mature person :)
really!
i think that why im getting more quiet than ever.
but i dont like myself when im quiet.
i miss being the talkative girl during pri school.
but i guess u might call me a loner or whatever now
cos i keep stoning and not talk at all....
but i guess its just trying not to discover more of how evil humans are.
its just trying to slow down the loss of childhood innocence.
but i know theres no use pretending i know evryone is good.
theres no us4 escaping it cos sooner or later i just have to face it.
theres evil all around.
and i just got to learn how not to be hurt by it.
im just being quiet cos i realised i like to stone.
i realised it helps me from making tactless remrks when im pissed.
i know if i say something u will noe im pissed.
i know if i say something i will just start an argument and in the end i will be the on getting most badly hurt.
i realised the more i talk, the more things i say which i shldnt have.
whether it is secrets or snide remarks.
i realised i always say too much and just let ppl know too much bout me that shldnt be said.
i realised that i shld just keep my feelings to myself and not say so much cos no one is interested and im just going to spoil ppl's mood.
i realised i shld think more and reflect more instead of making ppl's life a misery.
and so i just listen to all those sounds flow pass me, and i stare into space thinking
anthea thinks im very philo.i think so too.
hmmmm....i guess its just being so stressed that i learn to sort out my thoughts and be a stronger and more mature person....
and basically its called growing up.
something everyone hates.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
you sound more matured!!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
you shld crap more often.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
really!!!!!! then become like all of us in 101. spongebob fanaitcs!!1
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
yah.i know...im trying to. but i guess i lost my crapping spirit when i came to rgs. i used to be talktive, but i realised alot more...and so now i have decided to be quiet. and sometimes i miss being crappy.but i just cant get it back.its called loss of childhood innocence.
sigh.
i really really really miss those days.
i miss my childhood even if i was deprived of a proper one.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
oh.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
that is sad.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
then must come in talk to us more!! like today when ora walking past the canal. we were crapping about setting up a civilisation then we fish all day and swim in the rivers. like that talk then happy!
and when i hear u speaking like that,
i cant help but smile
i cant helped but be touched by ur innocence.
and im sorry if i just ruined ur innocence by making u realise that u will lose it next time.
perhaps the time hasnt come for u to grow up,
and so i think u shld just enjoy ur childhood innocence while u can.
and i guess all i can do is stare at you with a smile enviously, and cry for my loss of innocence.
i feel bad ruining ur image of how good life can be.
or maybe its just a part of you that will never change.
a part in you which i will never have.
sigh
ooh.i must rmb to write to tianyi,and other juniors when i get their names.
oh.
and deanna from 108 is someone's sis.hmmm.
shes anthea's friend and my sis friend's sis.....
whatever.
i shall not be extra and write to her.
i shall write to ashley cos anthea says she is cute.
i think i must learn to express my self better.
i think blogging has improved my writing skills.
i think i blog long posts cos whatever i dont say i type.
i think i like writing more than talking...
which reminds me.
i have been running away from it.
and sooner or later im gonna have to face it.
but oh man, how am i supposed to go about it....and i think im just hurting everyone by dragging it and avoiding it at my own whim and fancy.
but i guess theres no one to tell me what to do. and in the end, im still alone. in fact more alone than ever.
sigh.
-lame joke alert-
Cat started this series of super lame jokes like:
Let me tell you a dirty joke. I fell into a drain.
I can't remember the other one. But anyway I came up with mine:
Let me tell you a stupid joke. I met you!
-end of lame joke alert-
"
this is cat's joke which i read of from mabel's blog.
and it certaintly did make me happy.
hahaha.
i love hpt, bimbo cat!
sometimes shes so lame she makes me laugh :)
i think its lamely funny.
like ice age 2.
and i love it !!!!!!
wheeeeeeeeeeee.
this made me happy.
well,
it just kind of made me un-pissed for a minute.
hmmmm.
im very jealous i dint get to go trning.
and when im jealous i am pissed.
and when i am pissed.
i am irritable.
so i suggest u get out of my way.
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
i dont care im gonna POUT all i want.
and im going to whine and whine and whine.
im freaking irritated.
and u can tell it when i start using "freaking"
i just lost my mood to blog.
HMPH HMPH HMPH HMPH MHPH
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyer.
im very agitated.
okay.
forget it.
today i wasted my life rotting away on a plastic chair in an ulu gombak stadium
during a ulu sports meet or whatever.
yes.
u heard GOMBAK
i even passed by toh tuck road.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im pissed.
and i kept whining to the person beside me that i wanted to go trning :)
haha
oh well.
anyway.
we went there not knowing what we were supposed to do.
no one told us.
so we hanged around.
until this ppl realised we were there to help.
and got us to do manual labour.
yes.
child abuse!!!!
haha.
oh well.
just me erika emelyn and lynnette
we had to carry heavy table tops and metal base of the table.
and then me and erika got redundant and unimportant jobs cos there wasnt much to do.
half the class got nothing to do.
we fo lucky got chosen to help out.
otherwise even more bored.
anyway,
erika and me got best jobs :)
haha.
the man see emelyn and lynnette skinny and long legs.
ask them be runners,
though i was insulted by his unknowing implication of saying WE had short fat legs....
oh well.
they had to run across the track after every heat.
which was aboit every 2mins or so.
haha.
just to pass one piece of paper to someone across the track.
impt job lorh.
haha.
me and eriks sat with impt ppl.
the time keepers :)
we sat there shake leg at finish line.
watch other friends run to and fro in the sun and rain.
we under shelter.
and got chair.
our dear frens stand for 7hrs
we sat so long our butt ache.
hahaha.
and we were the only ones offered food and drinks :)
but we kindly asked our frens to help themselves.
omg.what am i crapping.hahaha.im just being ego so i altered the facts XD
the nice time keeper asked them to eat lah.
ok ok.
anyway.
ilove coffee.
thx to erika :)
i drank one cup of tea,
2 half cups of coffee ultr sweet :)
one cup of orange punch
and zero amt of water.
so my throat hurts like siao now XD
i added alot of suger and milk powder in my coffee.
tonight i sure cant sleep
so im gonna stay up tonight:)
im addicted to coffee!
im gonna be diabetic at the rate i add sugar in.
and erika says if i drink 100 cups of coffee in 1hr, i will die.
ahhhh!
and erika is cool and nice whichj i found out today
im so glad i was with her.
otherwise i would have done something tiring and boring and less relaxing
hahaha.
that ____ totally irked me off.
and nga man told me "coffee mix"
is actually milk.
i so loser lah.
she was like : this is tea and coffee mix.
i was like:
ewwwwwww.tea and coffee mix tgth will die one leh
loser lah.
then she was like coffee mix is the milk u put in coffee.
-_-
ok.
i know im so loser-fied.
anway me and erika sat sheltered and comfortably shaking legs under the tent.
seeing who come in last.
then just tell the person.
haha.so cool right.
rgs only got 4 girls running.
lousy lah
anyway.
me and eriks took mrt home tgth.
and we were gossiping !!!!
wheeeeeeeee.
oh and the CIP was quite fun cos we were puking at those guys in tights.
and listening to the time keepers story about love.
hahaha.
who cares bout him lah
he keep wanting to say how he met his wife
and its by a plum seed.
yes
hahaha.lame right.
and then another guy was saying bout single is good.
then the old man say.
aiyah, dont say this in front of them, otherwise they dont want to get married.
ahhaa
they started getting pro-natalist after that.
heehee.
was amusing lah
oooh.
and talking to anthea makes me remember my sec one days.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
oh and tianyi say she going to reply your letter
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
she likes you you know!!!
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
hahaha.u all so obvious is making fun of her lorh
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
and i know im likable but she dont need to like me so much rite.....
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
aiyoh.its cos im a senior lah.last time i sec one, i also like that lorh.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
no really!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
she everyday ask me hows lifang
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
and then today she ask me if you going to ora. then i say i dont know
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
then she like so disappointed.
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
omg
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
she crush me ah? XD
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
but she is just super happy lah
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
ok ok.
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
i shall get ppl to writwe to her
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
she will be happier
oooohmegosh.
tianyi is my junior, my mortal's friend and yu hui's mortal!
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
oooooh me gosh
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
tian yi IS her mortal!!!!!!!!!!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
is it tianyi!!1
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
tianyi is so happy!!1
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
but tianyi never give yu hui flowers before!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
then today at ora tianyi met yu hui then later yu hui blush!!!!!! i saw her face went red like WHOOSH!
hahaha.tianyi is as cute as her angel!
both blush like siao one!
yuhui says:
you should have seen tianyi's expression when she saw me during ora
yuhui says:
she was talking and laughinjg with ehr friends
yuhui says:
then when she saw me
yuhui says:
her face was...
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
my mortal just told me that
yuhui says:
i dunno.
yuhui says:
ohh
yuhui says:
hahahhaha
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
she said ur face was red like whoooosh
yuhui says:
really?
yuhui says:
haha
yuhui says:
i didnt realise
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
hahaha.u always blush
yuhui says:
cos it was damn funyn lah tianyi's face
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
hahaha.i bet she found u funny too
yuhui says:
i think cos i was laughing silently at her face
yuhui says:
cos like
yuhui says:
damn funny lah
yuhui says:
hedh
yuhui says:
heh*
yuhui says:
she was like scared/ shocked dunno what
yuhui says:
then i was like
yuhui says:
"lifts up eyebrow"
haha.
yu hui though is tianyi blush then she try not to laugh
but i guess they ended up blushing at each other!!!
oh well.
i love anthea!!!!!!!!
wheeeeee.
and i miss squash.
eeeeyer.
my life feels empty without it
i ate dinner at like 8pm today.
hah.
so random
talking bout tianyi,
she reminds me of how last year we sec ones were like crazy when __________.
right my dear squashers?
ahaha.
mybe its just jodee and me lah.
and mable wasn tlike that last year.
only this year lorh
right mabel :)
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
first lesson. she ask why japan so packed. i said super softly, maybe because of the sumo wrestlers. dont know how she hear she come to me and ask what my name was. 2nd lesson know my name already.
omg.
i know this is mean.
but my mortal is so cute :)
but thats why she so racist and tactless thats why her teacher pissed with her.
hmmmmm.
i think im so philosophical when i told her to respect other ppl's culture :)
heehee.
im a good role model! a wonderful senior!!!
wheeeee.
but i think that wud be something i wud say last time.
but i realised i have really matured in my thinking alot.
i think its what squash has done for me.
even if the outcome of trnings wernt very desirable.
the process made me a better, stronger, more mature person :)
really!
i think that why im getting more quiet than ever.
but i dont like myself when im quiet.
i miss being the talkative girl during pri school.
but i guess u might call me a loner or whatever now
cos i keep stoning and not talk at all....
but i guess its just trying not to discover more of how evil humans are.
its just trying to slow down the loss of childhood innocence.
but i know theres no use pretending i know evryone is good.
theres no us4 escaping it cos sooner or later i just have to face it.
theres evil all around.
and i just got to learn how not to be hurt by it.
im just being quiet cos i realised i like to stone.
i realised it helps me from making tactless remrks when im pissed.
i know if i say something u will noe im pissed.
i know if i say something i will just start an argument and in the end i will be the on getting most badly hurt.
i realised the more i talk, the more things i say which i shldnt have.
whether it is secrets or snide remarks.
i realised i always say too much and just let ppl know too much bout me that shldnt be said.
i realised that i shld just keep my feelings to myself and not say so much cos no one is interested and im just going to spoil ppl's mood.
i realised i shld think more and reflect more instead of making ppl's life a misery.
and so i just listen to all those sounds flow pass me, and i stare into space thinking
anthea thinks im very philo.i think so too.
hmmmm....i guess its just being so stressed that i learn to sort out my thoughts and be a stronger and more mature person....
and basically its called growing up.
something everyone hates.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
you sound more matured!!!!
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
you shld crap more often.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
really!!!!!! then become like all of us in 101. spongebob fanaitcs!!1
liF aN g]]; superficiality. i detest humans. do you get my point.if u do, get lost. says:
yah.i know...im trying to. but i guess i lost my crapping spirit when i came to rgs. i used to be talktive, but i realised alot more...and so now i have decided to be quiet. and sometimes i miss being crappy.but i just cant get it back.its called loss of childhood innocence.
sigh.
i really really really miss those days.
i miss my childhood even if i was deprived of a proper one.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
oh.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
that is sad.
anthea bite.my.nails. says:
then must come in talk to us more!! like today when ora walking past the canal. we were crapping about setting up a civilisation then we fish all day and swim in the rivers. like that talk then happy!
and when i hear u speaking like that,
i cant help but smile
i cant helped but be touched by ur innocence.
and im sorry if i just ruined ur innocence by making u realise that u will lose it next time.
perhaps the time hasnt come for u to grow up,
and so i think u shld just enjoy ur childhood innocence while u can.
and i guess all i can do is stare at you with a smile enviously, and cry for my loss of innocence.
i feel bad ruining ur image of how good life can be.
or maybe its just a part of you that will never change.
a part in you which i will never have.
sigh
ooh.i must rmb to write to tianyi,and other juniors when i get their names.
oh.
and deanna from 108 is someone's sis.hmmm.
shes anthea's friend and my sis friend's sis.....
whatever.
i shall not be extra and write to her.
i shall write to ashley cos anthea says she is cute.
i think i must learn to express my self better.
i think blogging has improved my writing skills.
i think i blog long posts cos whatever i dont say i type.
i think i like writing more than talking...
which reminds me.
i have been running away from it.
and sooner or later im gonna have to face it.
but oh man, how am i supposed to go about it....and i think im just hurting everyone by dragging it and avoiding it at my own whim and fancy.
but i guess theres no one to tell me what to do. and in the end, im still alone. in fact more alone than ever.
sigh.
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